“I make fun of situations and try and find the humor in things, but it’s never at the expense of the other guy.”

I hit a grand slam off Ron Herbel and when his manager Herman Franks came out to get him, he was bringing Herbel’s suitcase.

People have asked me a lot of times, because I didn’t hit a lot, how long a dozen bats would last me.

Today you don’t have to do that, because catchers’ mitts are more like first baseman’s gloves.

Phil Niekro and his brother were pitching against each other in Atlanta. Their parents were sitting right behind home plate.

I saw their folks more that day than they did the whole weekend.

I don’t like losing. But I don’t think I ever go to the park where I have a bad day. I don’t think once.

I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.

Depending on the weight and model I was using at that time – I would say eight to 10 cookouts.

I was acting when I was playing baseball.

You know, I was once named Minor League Player of the Year… unfortunately, I had been in the majors for two years at the time.

He really showed me something. Struck out three times. Made an error that lost the game. Parents were throwing things at our car and swearing at us as we drove off. Gosh, I was proud.

The biggest thrill a ballplayer can have is when your son takes after you. That happened when my Bobby was in his championship Little League game.

Where would I be without baseball? Who am I without baseball?

Before broadcasting for 50-some years, I did TV, played 10 years in the big leagues, won a world championship – and played a big part in that, too, letting the Cardinals inject me with hepatitis. Takes a big man to do that.

Sure, women sportswriters look when they’re in the clubhouse. Read their stories. How else do you explain a capital letter in the middle of a word?

I spent three of the best years of my life in 10th grade.

Now things on TV are every bit as good or better than what you find in movie theatres.

Well, it has done terrifying things. Religious ideas are inflammatory in a way that I find difficult to understand. There are very few wars over the theory of relativity. Very few heated arguments, for that matter. Whereas, in Northern Ireland, they are killing one another over religion.

When I first found out I had HIV, I had to find somebody who was living with it, who could help me understand my journey and what I was going to have to deal with day-to-day.

To find some lasting comfort in the arms of anothers fire…driven by a desperate hunger to the arms of a neon light, the heart is a lonely hunter when there’s no sign of love in sight!

Anyway, I just haven’t been able to find any humanity in any Republican candidate ever in my entire life.

I think God has blessed us. He has blessed the Republican Party with some very good candidates. The Democrats can’t even find one.

If we capture any of these ISIS killers alive, they are going to Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, and we’re going to find out everything they know, because when I’m president, unlike Barack Obama, we will keep this country safe.

It is the irritation of getting tickets, packing, finding trains, lying in bouncing berths, washing without water, digging out passports, and fighting through customs.