Let’s reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools – and use it on the teachers.
P. J. O'ROURKESome people think that welfare reform should have hurt Bill Clinton with black voters.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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Maybe climate change is a threat, and maybe climate change has been tarted up by climatologists trolling for research grant cash. It doesn’t matter.
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My dad died when I was young; my mom remarried with more haste than sense to a fellow… he wasn’t evil or anything, but he was worthless.
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Explosion of positive rights started in 1932 with the election of Roosevelt.
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Each child is biologically required to have a mother. Fatherhood is a well-regarded theory, but motherhood is a fact.
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In its worse forms, conservatism is a matter of ‘I hate strangers and anything that’s different.’
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America has to act. But, when America acts, other nations accuse us of being ‘hegemonistic’, of engaging in ‘unilateralism’, of behaving as if we’re the only nation on earth that counts. We are.
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Gossip is what you say about the objects of flattery when they aren’t present.
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Sometimes the right response to evil is an appeal to powerful and effective social organization – an appeal to civilization itself.
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Globalization is simply opening the free marketplace to encompass the entire world.
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If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat – in other words, turn you into an adult.
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Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
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When elites see a homeless person in the gutter, they assume he’s saving a parking place.
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Catchphrases flourish in contemporary American English.
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Preachers at black churches are the last people left in the English-speaking world who know the schemes and tropes of classical rhetoric: parallelism, antithesis, epistrophe, synecdoche, metonymy, periphrasis, litotes – the whole bag of tricks.
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If you spend 72 hours in a place you’ve never been, talking to people whose language you don’t speak about social, political, and economic complexities you don’t understand, and you come back as the world’s biggest know-it-all, you’re a reporter. Either that or you’re President Obama.
P. J. O'ROURKE