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If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.

Al Yankovic

He put Ben Gay inside my jock strap and filled my tooth paste tube up with glue.
AL YANKOVIC

Gay Inside Jock Paste Revenge Strap Tooth Tube
I try to pick songs that I actually like because I realize that I have to live with these songs for a long time, from when I’m working on them in the studio to possibly playing them onstage for the rest of my life.
AL YANKOVIC

Actual Life Long Onstage Pick Possible Realize Rest Song Studio Time Work
I don’t watch a lot of other people’s parodies because I don’t want to be unduly influenced.
AL YANKOVIC

Influence People Unduly Watch
It fit pretty nicely into my schedule because we’d pretty much finished the bulk of promotion for Mandatory Fun and were just getting geared up for the World Tour so this was a nice time for me to be working on it.
AL YANKOVIC

Bulk Finish Fit Mandatory Nicely Pretty Promotion Scheule
About four or five months ago, at a dinner in New York, John made the very nice offer of my being guest editor for an issue of MAD and I thought about it for about half a nanosecond and decided that was a pretty good idea.
AL YANKOVIC

Editor Five Good Guest Idea Issue Month Nanosecond Nice Offer Pretty
I love the way they run in fright when I turn on the kitchen light. And when I squish them on the ground, they make a pleasant crunchy sound.
AL YANKOVIC

Fright Ground Kitchen Light Love Pleasant Run Sound Squish
I decided that I wanted to be a voice on every animated cartoon in the history of the world – even shows that haven’t been on the air for a very long time, that’s going to be harder to pull off.
AL YANKOVIC

Animate Cartoon Decide History Long Show Time Voice Want Worlds
How can you get bored if the audience is cheering and laughing at something you’re doing?
AL YANKOVIC

Audience Bore Cheer Do Parody Something
As my father used to tell me, the only true sign of success in life is being able to do for a living that which makes you happy.
AL YANKOVIC

Able Dad Father Life Live Make Success
As much as people are griping about the Internet taking sales away from artists, it’s been a huge promotional tool for me.
AL YANKOVIC

Artist Grip Huge Much People Promotion Tool
My velvet Elvis means the world to me. Although he may not be worth much dough, he means more to me than some old Rembrandt or Van Gogh.
AL YANKOVIC

Although Dough Mean Some Velvet World Worth
I dated Siamese twins, I slept with Big Foot, too. Get me on Sally Jesse, put me on Donahue.
AL YANKOVIC

Big Date Foot Put Sally Siamese Slept Too Twin
I’m very analytical, I’m very precise. I mean, I don’t write for kids.
AL YANKOVIC

Analytical Kid Precise Very Write
I have very mixed feelings about it. On one hand, I’m concerned that the rampant downloading of my copyright-protected material over the Internet is severely eating into my album sales and having a decidedly adverse effect on my career.
AL YANKOVIC

Career Concern Copyright Download Feel Hand MIxed One Rampant Song
I guess I lost a little bit of self-esteem that time that you made it with the whole hockey team.
AL YANKOVIC

Esteem Hockey Little Lost Made Self Team
Probably 90 percent of my albums have polka medleys.
AL YANKOVIC

Album Medley Percent Polka Probably

If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.

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If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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