“I love the fact that I have a show where you can run over a kid and everyone busts out laughing.”

You got to be careful of the company you keep.

It seems like there’s never enough famous white people among comic in Hollywood.

I have a very good life, a high quality of life. I have both money and time. No one has that.

I always take a relationship to the next level. If that works out, I take it to the next level after that, until I finally reach that level when it becomes absolutely necessary for me to leave.

One of the things that happens when people make the leap from a certain amount of money to tens of millions of dollars is that the people around you dramatically change.

No matter how old you are, if a little kid hands you a toy phone, you answer it.

You know you must be doing something right if old people like you.

I’m famous today. People like me today. Might not like me tomorrow. You can’t count on it.

Weed’s not as bad as everything else… ’cause weed is a background substance. You know what I mean, you can smoke some herb and still function. You ain’t crisp… but you’ll function.

I was doing sketches that were funny but socially irresponsible. I felt I was deliberately being encouraged and I was overwhelmed.

If I can make a teacher’s salary doing comedy, I think that’s better than being a teacher.

If you don’t have the right people around you and you’re moving at a million miles an hour you can lose yourself.

I care about the work I do. But I’m not going to say that money’s not an issue.

Chivalry is dead. Women killed it.

Something about New York, man: You can do more comedy there probably than you can anywhere in the world. If you’re interested in being funny, New York is the place to go.

My wife asked me once if I weren’t a comedian, what I would do. I couldn’t answer the question. I never imagined doing anything else.

I like someone who’s not afraid to be a kid!

See the world with the innocence of children. Approach the world with the daring of children. Love the world with the readiness of children. Heal the world with the purity of children. Change the world with the wisdom of children.

No matter how old you are, if a little kid hands you a toy phone, you answer it.

We can seldom get our children to do what we tell them, but they almost never fail to imitate us.

When you’re young, you’re not afraid of what comes next. You’re excited by it.

I think I’m playing grown up because I have kids now. But I don’t feel grown up yet.

My kids don’t have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. And when I die, they’re $4 million in the hole.

Since people are going to be living longer and getting older, they’ll just have to learn how to be babies longer.