Something about New York, man: You can do more comedy there probably than you can anywhere in the world. If you’re interested in being funny, New York is the place to go.
DAVE CHAPPELLEThey do what they do for money – that’s all. I don’t even know why you’re listening to me. I’ve done commercials for both Coke and Pepsi. Truth is, I can’t even taste the difference, but Pepsi paid me last, so there it is.
More Dave Chappelle Quotes
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I got married recently. So far, so good. Less sex than I expected, but other than that, it’s a pretty good lifestyle.
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The kid is the best thing that ever happened to me.
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Ralph Nader has slavery reparations on his platform, which makes me think he’s not serious. If he thought he could win he wouldn’t even say that.
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If I can make a teacher’s salary doing comedy, I think that’s better than being a teacher.
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The way the people around you position themselves around you to get in your pockets and in your mind is infuriating to me.
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Stand-up is the kind of gig that’ll show you where you’re at.
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You got to be careful of the company you keep.
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I always take a relationship to the next level. If that works out, I take it to the next level after that, until I finally reach that level when it becomes absolutely necessary for me to leave.
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If you don’t have the right people around you and you’re moving at a million miles an hour you can lose yourself.
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Once you been performing on the streets you can conquer any venue.
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Fame for me is like a place, a country I’m taking a tour through.
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One of the things that happens when people make the leap from a certain amount of money to tens of millions of dollars is that the people around you dramatically change.
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I don’t normally talk about my religion publicly because I don’t want people to associate me and my flaws with this beautiful thing. And I believe it is beautiful religion if you learn it the right way.
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I enjoy my own thoughts sometimes.
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The worst thing to call somebody is crazy. It’s dismissive.
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The world can’t tell you who you are. You’ve just got to figure out who you are and be there, for better or worse.
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Comedians by and large are some of the most sensitive people on earth. Even if they’re socially callous.
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My wife asked me once if I weren’t a comedian, what I would do. I couldn’t answer the question. I never imagined doing anything else.
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I love the fact that I have a show where you can run over a kid and everyone busts out laughing.
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I have angst in my life, but I’m like anybody. We all have angst in our lives that we pick up and fidget with and then we put down and look at some other things that make us feel good or enjoy our lives.
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The hardest thing to do is to be true to yourself, especially when everybody is watching.
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People don’t know what it’s like standing up there onstage, when you have a wall of people smiling at you.
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It seems like there’s never enough famous white people among comic in Hollywood.
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Chivalry is dead. Women killed it.
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Being famous is great, it’s not like bad or horrible or anything.
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For one year, I want to do this thing where I guest-star on as many television shows as I possibly can. I love television. The fact that television ultimately made me famous was very gratifying for me.
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