“Yankees don’t understand that the Southern way of talking is a language of nuance. What we can do in the South is we can take a word and change it just a little bit and make it mean something altogether different.”

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married.

It’s difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato.

Mama had an appreciation of the language. She taught me a love of words, of how they should be used and how they can fill a creative soul with a passion and lead to a life’s work.

Kinky sex involves the use of duck feathers. Perverted sex involves the whole duck.

Spring time is the land awakening.

Elvis is dead and I don’t feel so good for myself.

Life is like a dogsled race. If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

I get letters from people who say, ‘What have you got against women?’ What could I possibly have against women? I’ve married three of them.

If you are not the lead dog, your scenery never changes.

There’s no such thing as being too Southern.

There’s nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.

I know lots of people who are educated far beyond their intelligence.

Sex hasn’t been the same since women started enjoying it.

Money doesn’t grow on trees, and if it did somebody else would own the orchard.

You call to a dog and a dog will break its neck to get to you. Dogs just want to please. Call to a cat and its attitude is, ‘What’s in it for me?’

Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.

Our joy in Him may be a fluctuating thing: His joy in us knows no change.

I change my mind so much I need two boyfriends and a girlfriend.

Be very proud of what you do, and if you aren’t then change it.

Forget about the consequences of failure. Failure is only a temporary change in direction to set you straight for your next success.

Our lives change externally as we change internally.

Sometimes it takes only one act of kindness and caring to change a person’s life.

One thing will not change – we will be going out to win.

Can I doubt the shape of the earth? Can I judge a minute for lasting sixty seconds, a day for being grey or cold and leaves for falling from trees? Can I speak too loud when I am angry or stay quiet when I disagree? Can I forget about the norms and make some of my own?