“Sex hasn’t been the same since women started enjoying it.”

They tore out my heart and stomped that sucker flat.

I’d much rather sit next to a smoker in a restaurant than a nose-blower.

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married.

It’s difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato.

Mama had an appreciation of the language. She taught me a love of words, of how they should be used and how they can fill a creative soul with a passion and lead to a life’s work.

Kinky sex involves the use of duck feathers. Perverted sex involves the whole duck.

Spring time is the land awakening.

Elvis is dead and I don’t feel so good for myself.

Life is like a dogsled race. If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

I get letters from people who say, ‘What have you got against women?’ What could I possibly have against women? I’ve married three of them.

If you are not the lead dog, your scenery never changes.

Yankees don’t understand that the Southern way of talking is a language of nuance. What we can do in the South is we can take a word and change it just a little bit and make it mean something altogether different.

There’s no such thing as being too Southern.

There’s nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.

I know lots of people who are educated far beyond their intelligence.

Money doesn’t grow on trees, and if it did somebody else would own the orchard.

Judge your success by the degree that you’re enjoying peace, health, and love.

If your work becomes a source of enjoyment and a challenge, it will never seem like work – it will be fun. If you ever feel that your work is a burden, there is no point carrying on with it.

I am a person who doesn’t like responsibility of any kind. But I do enjoy what I do.

I am still here because I like to prove myself. I still like to ride the bike on track and enjoy the races. I still have good reasons to be in racing after so many years.

I am focused on racing. I enjoy it. It’s a great feeling to be back fighting for the title.

After you’ve work hard to get what you want, take the time to enjoy it.

Life is a song-sing it. Life is a game-play it. Life is a challenge-meet it. Life is a dream-realize it. Life is a sacrifice-offer it. Life is love-enjoy it.

Boys, Laila came to see, treated friendship the way they treated the sun: its existence undisputed; its radiance best enjoyed, not beheld directly.