I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.
DOROTHY PARKER[On being shown an apartment by a real estate agent:] Oh, dear, that’s much too big. All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
More Dorothy Parker Quotes
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Should they whisper false of you, Never trouble to deny; Should the words they say be true, Weep and storm and say they lie.
DOROTHY PARKER -
The writer’s way is rough and lonely, and who would choose it while there are vacancies in more gracious professions, such as, say, cleaning out ferryboats?
DOROTHY PARKER -
People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, can be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Now, look, baby, ‘Union’ is spelled with 5 letters. It is not a four-letter word.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
DOROTHY PARKER -
And I’ll stay off Verlaine too; he was always chasing Rimbauds.
DOROTHY PARKER -
A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika.
DOROTHY PARKER -
You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think.
DOROTHY PARKER -
It was written without fear and without research.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it’s so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Bewildered is the fox who lives to find that grapes beyond reach can be really sour.
DOROTHY PARKER -
The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.
DOROTHY PARKER -
They sicken of the calm who know the storm.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Money cannot buy health, but I’d settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
DOROTHY PARKER