The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, ‘Where the hell is my roof?
STEVEN WRIGHTSteven Wright Quotes
Full Name:Steven Alexander Wright
Walk of life:American stand-up comedian
Born:6 December 1955, US
Read on: Wikipedia
Feature Image:By 48states at English Wikipedia, CC BY-SA 3.0
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The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, ‘Where the hell is my roof?
STEVEN WRIGHT
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When I was in school the teachers told me practice makes perfect; then they told me nobody’s perfect so I stopped practicing.
STEVEN WRIGHT
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If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
STEVEN WRIGHT
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It was the first time I was ever in love, and I learned a lot. Before that I’d never even thought about killing myself.
STEVEN WRIGHT
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Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.
STEVEN WRIGHT
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Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
STEVEN WRIGHT
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I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out.
STEVEN WRIGHT
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You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
STEVEN WRIGHT
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When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child… eventually.
STEVEN WRIGHT
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No one is listening until you make a mistake.
STEVEN WRIGHT