I don’t like peas, and I’m glad I don’t like them, because if I liked them I would eat them and I hate them.
QUENTIN CRISPTo my disappointment I now realized that to know all is not to forgive all. It is to despise everybody.
More Quentin Crisp Quotes
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The more people one has to love, the more one’s capacity to love stretches.
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Men get laid, but women get screwed.
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To live in the past is to miss today’s opportunities and tomorrow’s blessings.
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Nothing shortens a journey so pleasantly as an account of misfortunes at which the hearer is permitted to laugh.
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The English think that incompetence is the same thing as sincerity.
QUENTIN CRISP -
Fashion is what you adopt when you don’t know who you are.
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The flagrantly gay Quentin Crisp dealt with homophobic bullying by refusing to bow to its onslaught. His number listed in the phone directory, he responded to derogatory remarks accompanied with a stated intent to kill him by asking, “Would you like to make an appointment?”
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Nothing more rapidly inclines a person to go into a monastery than reading a book on etiquette. There are so many trivial ways in which it is possible to commit some social sin.
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In England, nobody’s your friend.
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And were then to lay his own garden path diagonally from one corner to the other, that man’s soul would be lost. Originality is only to be praised when not prefaced by the look to right and left.
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In England, the system is benign and the people are hostile. In America, the people are friendlyand the system is brutal!
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Keeping up with the Joneses was a full-time job with my mother and father. It was not until many years later when I lived alone that I realized how much cheaper it was to drag the Joneses down to my level.
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My mother protected me from the world and my father threatened me with it.
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Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level.
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If you describe things as better than they are, you are considered to be a romantic; if you describe things as worse than they are, you will be called a realist; and if you describe things exactly as they are, you will be thought of as a satirist.
QUENTIN CRISP