Happiness is the only thing I understand.
QUENTIN CRISPThe English think that incompetence is the same thing as sincerity.
More Quentin Crisp Quotes
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You don’t have to deal with anyone in America. They accept you the way you are.
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Never sweep. After four years the dirt gets no worse.
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If a man were to look over the fence on one side of his garden and observe that the neighbor on his left had laid his garden path round a central lawn; and were to look over the fence on the other side of his garden and observe that the neighbor on his right had laid his path down the middle of the lawn.
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Look inward and ask not if there is anything outside you want, but whether there is anything inside that you have not yet unpacked.
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The British do not expect happiness. I had the impression, all the time that I lived there, that they do not want to be happy; they want to be right.
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The young always have the same problem – how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying one another.
QUENTIN CRISP -
Life was a funny thing that happened to me on the way to the grave.
QUENTIN CRISP -
The formula for achieving a successful relationship is simple: you should treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
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Manners are love in a cool climate.
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It’s a strange situation, but people will pay your fare to get you to go and tell them how to be happy.
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The worst part of being gay in the twentieth century is all that damn disco music to which one has to listen.
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Though intelligence is powerless to modify character, it is a dab hand at finding euphemisms for its weaknesses.
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Neither look forward where there is doubt nor backward where there is regret.
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Politics are not an instrument for effecting social change; they are the art of making the inevitable appear to be a matter of wise human choice.
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To my disappointment I now realized that to know all is not to forgive all. It is to despise everybody.
QUENTIN CRISP