Just because a subject is serious doesn’t mean it doesn’t have plenty of absurdities.
P. J. O'ROURKEEnding wars is very simple if you surrender.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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Politics is a necessary evil, or a necessary annoyance, a necessary conundrum.
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Arab-led Islamic fundamentalism destabilizes nations from Algeria to the Philippines.
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If you think health care is expensive now, just wait ’til it’s free.
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The Communist bloc of old was a study in the failure of failure. Losers in the Soviet economy were the people at the end of the long lines for consumer goods. Worse losers were the people who had spent hours getting to the head of the line, only to be told that the goods were unavailable.
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People will tell you anything but what they do is always the truth.
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Russians not only vehemently despise blacks, they believe Africa begins at the Ukraine border.
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A U.S. dollar is an IOU from the Federal Reserve Bank. It’s a promissory note that doesn’t actually promise anything. It’s not backed by gold or silver.
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The beauty of democracy is that an average, random, unremarkable citizen can lead it.
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There is a simple rule here, a rule of legislation, a rule of business, a rule of life: beyond a certain point, complexity is fraud. You can apply that rule to left-wing social programs, but you can also apply that rule to credit derivatives, hedge funds, all the rest of it.
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The baby boomers’ politics have covered a wide band of silliness, from the Weather Underground to the Timothy McVeigh types. The great majority of us are well in the middle of that spectrum, but still, there’s been both leftie silliness and right-wing silliness.
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In its worse forms, conservatism is a matter of ‘I hate strangers and anything that’s different.’
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Like most sensible people, you probably lost interest in modern art about the time that Julian Schnabel was painting broken pieces of the crockery that his wife had thrown at him for painting broken pieces of crockery instead of painting the bathroom and hall.
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I look around my house, and everything except the kids and dogs was made in China. And I’m not sure about the kids. They have brown eyes and small noses.
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I come from Toledo, Ohio, a town that has been hurt badly by the shift of the automobile business towards Japan. And yet I remember how the car workers lived in the neighborhood that I grew up in. My father was a car salesman, and I remember how we lived. I remember how modestly we lived.
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Death is so important that God visited death upon his own son, thereby helping us learn right from wrong well enough that we may escape death forever and live eternally in God’s grace.
P. J. O'ROURKE