Let’s reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools – and use it on the teachers.
P. J. O'ROURKECatchphrases flourish in contemporary American English.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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I don’t even know which end of a computer one is supposed to gaze into. I’ve never used a computer.
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Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
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I rarely meet a politician that I don’t like personally. They are generally well endowed with charm. Therein lies the danger.
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The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop.
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Each child is biologically required to have a mother. Fatherhood is a well-regarded theory, but motherhood is a fact.
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If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.
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The people who despise America are the editors of the ‘New Statesman.’ Their green-card applications must have been turned down.
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Wealth is not a pizza, where if I have too many slices you have to eat the Domino’s box.
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Finland is a rich country. What have they got? They got Nokia phones and plywood. How’d they get so rich? Because they’re free.
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Death is so important that God visited death upon his own son, thereby helping us learn right from wrong well enough that we may escape death forever and live eternally in God’s grace.
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When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.
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America has to act. But, when America acts, other nations accuse us of being ‘hegemonistic’, of engaging in ‘unilateralism’, of behaving as if we’re the only nation on earth that counts. We are.
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I know quite a few fellow members of the news analysis and commentary business, and I have it from the highest-placed sources, on the record, that each and every one of our children is a genius.
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We need a government, alas, because of the nature of humans.
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Sometimes the right response to evil is an appeal to powerful and effective social organization – an appeal to civilization itself.
P. J. O'ROURKE






