Adam Smith’s huge failure was the fact that he did not foresee the industrial revolution.
P. J. O'ROURKEThe C student starts a restaurant. The A student writes restaurant reviews.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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Don’t send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals, when their cheery effect is needed.
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You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they’re going.
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Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.
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The most brilliant satire of all time was ‘A Modest Proposal’ by Jonathan Swift. You’ll notice how everything got straightened out in Ireland within days of that coming out.
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Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope.
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Politics is a necessary evil, or a necessary annoyance, a necessary conundrum.
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I don’t even know which end of a computer one is supposed to gaze into. I’ve never used a computer.
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Think what evil creeps liberals would be if their plans to enfeeble the individual, exhaust the economy, impede the rule of law, and cripple national defense were guided by a coherent ideology instead of smug ignorance.
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A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat.
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There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.
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Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.
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The 20th century was a test bed for big ideas – fascism, communism, the atomic bomb.
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I like making things. I have a wood shop at home. I am a terrible carpenter but I love doing it.
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The Afghans themselves say that if you put two Afghans in a room, you get three factions.
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A fundamental American question is, ‘What’s the big idea?’
P. J. O'ROURKE