If I want a long, boring story with no point to it, I have my life.
JERRY SEINFELDMagazines are another medium I love, because 95% is simply based on ‘How the hell are we going to fill all this blank space?
More Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
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I am so busy doing nothing… that the idea of doing anything – which as you know, always leads to something – cuts into the nothing and then forces me to have to drop everything.
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There’s more to life than making shallow, fairly obvious observations.
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Once you start doing only what you’ve already proven you can do, you’re on the road to death.
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That’s why breakups take two or three times- to build up immunity.
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Dogs have no money. Isn’t that amazing? They’re broke their entire lives. But they get through. You know why dogs have no money? .. No Pockets.
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You know the message you’re sending out to the world with these sweatpants? You’re telling the world, ‘I give up. I can’t compete in normal society. I’m miserable, so I might as well be comfortable.
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What I don’t understand is how women can pour hot wax on their bodies, let it dry, then rip out every single hair by its root and still be scared of spiders.
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The best revenge is living well.
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When you’ve been in the business 5-years, as a person, it’s like you’re 5-years old – like a child. 10-years and you’re 10-years old, 20… Etcetera. That’s how I measure maturity in this industry.
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I’ve been car crazy my whole life, since I was nine years old. It’s just something I’m very aware of.
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This is one of my big things of creative pursuits. You have your idea you want to do, but then you got to figure out what does this thing want to be? You got to let it lead you a little.
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Most people, you do a TV series, it ends three, four, five years later; it’s a relic.
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Wise is what you want to be. Smart is easy compared to wise.
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Your blessing in life is when you find the torture you’re comfortable with.
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See, you know how to take the reservation, you just don’t know how to hold the reservation and that’s really the most important part of the reservation, the holding. Anybody can just take them.
JERRY SEINFELD