There’s life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.
DOROTHY PARKERTake me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
More Dorothy Parker Quotes
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Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Now, look, baby, ‘Union’ is spelled with 5 letters. It is not a four-letter word.
DOROTHY PARKER -
It’s not the tragedies that kill us; it’s the messes.
DOROTHY PARKER -
But I don’t give up; I forget why not.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.
DOROTHY PARKER -
That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker.
DOROTHY PARKER -
The only useful thing I ever learned in school was that if you spit on your eraser it erased ink.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I don’t mind anything that’s written about me, as long as it’s not true.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I hate writing, I love having written.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I’d like to have money. And I’d like to be a good writer. These two can come together, and I hope they will, but if that’s too adorable, I’d rather have money.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Writing is the art of applying the ass to the seat.
DOROTHY PARKER -
By the time you swear you’re his, Shivering and sighing. And he vows his passion is, Infinite, undying. Lady make note of this — One of you is lying.
DOROTHY PARKER