I’m not a comic. I’m a humorist.
DICK GREGORYI waited at the counter of a white restaurant for eleven years. When they finally integrated, they didn’t have what I wanted.
More Dick Gregory Quotes
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You hear entertainers all the time, saying, ‘If I couldn’t get paid for this, I’d do it for free.’ When’s the last time you ever heard a business person say, ‘If I couldn’t get paid for being chairman of British Petroleum, I’d do it for free?’
DICK GREGORY -
There is a limit on how much information you can keep bottled up.
DICK GREGORY -
One of the things I keep learning is that the secret of being happy is doing things for other people.
DICK GREGORY -
Revolution ain’t nothing but an extent of evolution; Evolution is a fact of nature.
DICK GREGORY -
Education means to bring out wisdom. Indoctrination means to push in knowledge.
DICK GREGORY -
America will tolerate the taking of a human life without giving it a second thought. But don’t misuse a household pet.
DICK GREGORY -
I tell people, ‘If you want to send a message to the White House, call my house.’
DICK GREGORY -
Poor is a state of mind you never grow out of, but being broke is just a temporary condition.
DICK GREGORY -
If it wasn’t for Abe Lincoln, I’d still be on the open market.
DICK GREGORY -
I tell people, ‘If you want to send a message to the White House, call my house.’
DICK GREGORY -
In most places in the country, voting is looked upon as a right and a duty, but in Chicago, it’s a sport.
DICK GREGORY -
We used to root for the Indians against the cavalry because we didn’t think it was fair in the history books that when the cavalry won it was a great victory, and when the Indians won it was a massacre.
DICK GREGORY -
When I was a boy, I was taught never to use insulting expressions like, ‘I’ve been gypped,’ or, ‘He welshed on the deal.’
DICK GREGORY -
If they took all the drugs, nicotine, alcohol, and caffeine off the market for six days, they’d have to bring out the tanks to control you.
DICK GREGORY -
Political promises are much like marriage vows. They are made at the beginning of the relationship between candidate and voter, but are quickly forgotten.
DICK GREGORY







