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Japanese is sort of a hobby of mine, and I can get around Japan with ease.

Dick Cavett

Years have passed since I have set foot in a comedy club. If the comic is doing badly it’s painful, and if the comic is doing brilliantly, it’s extremely painful.
DICK CAVETT

Brilliant Comedy Foot Myself Pain Time
Teaching is an art and a profession requiring years of training.
DICK CAVETT

Art Profession Requirement Teaching Training
In the main, ghosts are said to be forlorn and generally miserable, if not downright depressed. The jolly ghost is rare.
DICK CAVETT

Depression Ghost Misery Rare
While other kids were out playing and doing healthy things, I read an ancient judo book with a neck hold that was fatal to so many people they finally dropped it from judo.
DICK CAVETT

Book Children Fatal Myself Neck Reading
Every comic can report a few ‘gift from the gods’ moments.
DICK CAVETT

Comic Gift God Moments Report
Comedians are sometimes resentful of their writers. Probably because it’s hard for giant egos to admit you need anyone but yourself to be what you are.
DICK CAVETT

Comedy Need Resent Writing Yourself
A conversation does not have to be scintillating in order to be memorable. I once met a president of the United States, and his second sentence to me was about knees.
DICK CAVETT

Conversation Memorable Myself Order Sentence
Every student of comedy should see Dame Edna at least twice.
DICK CAVETT

Comedy See Student
I think I’d be pretty easy to write for.
DICK CAVETT

Easy Myself Pretty Thinking Writing
It takes a certain amount of guts to go to your class reunions.
DICK CAVETT

Amount Class Union
I hate Danny Kaye movies.
DICK CAVETT

Hate Movie Myself
I am always shocked that there are still a handful of defenders of the dubious practice of abstinence, surely the worst idea since chocolate-covered ants.
DICK CAVETT

Chocolate Hands Ideas Myself Practice Shock Worst
It’s a tribute to the human brain that anyone is able to function out there on television in a talk situation that is entirely artificial.
DICK CAVETT

Artificial Function Human Situation Tribute
Home schooling as an idea is on a par with home dentistry.
DICK CAVETT

Dentist Home Ideas School
I like when the ice gets thin, the going gets rough, the guests get edgy.
DICK CAVETT

Edge Guest Ice Myself
Depression – it falls into that small category of things like combat that, if you haven’t been in it, you can say you can imagine it all you like. But it’s truly different.
DICK CAVETT

Category Depression Different Small True
To call New York’s traffic at holiday time a nightmare is to understate.
DICK CAVETT

Holiday Night Time Traffic
I’m not freakishly short. I had, on my show, used shortness as a joke subject; it didn’t really bother me.
DICK CAVETT

Joke Myself Short Show Subject
Meryl Streep belongs on anybody’s list of greats.
DICK CAVETT

Greatness List Name
William F. Buckley was a man who had a great capacity for fun and for amusing himself by amazing others.
DICK CAVETT

Amazing Capacity Greatness Man
There should be three days a week when no one is allowed to say: ‘What’s your sign?’ Violators would have their copies of Kahlil Gibran confiscated.
DICK CAVETT

Allow Day Violate
When I’m doing an appearance somewhere and taking questions from the audience, I can always count on: ‘Tell about the guy who died on your show!’
DICK CAVETT

Appearance Count Death Show Talk Yourself
I confess, I do have to remind myself almost daily that there are people on this earth capable of reading, writing, eating and dressing themselves who believe their lives are ruled from billions of miles away, by the stars – and, of course, the planets.
DICK CAVETT

Believe Confession Live Planet Reading Reminder Space
A grown man, weeping, is a tough thing to see.
DICK CAVETT

Growth Man See Tough
I always wanted to live in a haunted house.
DICK CAVETT

Haunt Home Live Myself
Japanese is sort of a hobby of mine, and I can get around Japan with ease.
DICK CAVETT

Easy Hobby Interest Myself
I eat at this German-Chinese restaurant and the food is delicious. The only problem is that an hour later you’re hungry for power.
DICK CAVETT

Eat Food Hungry Myself Power

Japanese is sort of a hobby of mine, and I can get around Japan with ease.

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Japanese is sort of a hobby of mine, and I can get around Japan with ease.

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