black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

When a soldier of the night’s watch dies they say, “And now his watch is over.” That’s what they say when a comedian dies. They go, “And now his tour is done.”

Brad Williams

It’s very confusing to me why people take comedians so seriously.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Comedian Confusing People
I don’t take too many things too seriously.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Many Seriously Things
I’m in awe of comedians that do things that I can’t do, whether it be a one-liner comic like Anthony Jeselnik, whether it be social issues commentary, whether it be – hell, Carrot Top. I can’t be Carrot Top. I can’t.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Comedian Issues
People ask me a lot like, “Hey, so when are you done with your tour?” Like when I die. That’s when I’m done with my tour.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Done Hey People
In every other aspect of their life, we have entertainment that is crafted almost to an individual. So they expect that from stand-up as well.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Aspect Entertainment Individual
There are plenty of wonderful, good fat people in the USA that have no problems being fat, who I have no problems with being fat.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Country People Problem
There is often times when I’m in a bar or after a show, and a woman just grabs my head and shoves it into her cleavage, or grabs my ass, or something like that which – don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining, but it’s just interesting. It’s just interesting that that occurs.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Bar Complaining Interesting
Most of the times to be honest with you, I get sexually harassed certainly more than I do to females, because… they are comfortable with me, and because they know I can’t take it to a dangerous place.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Dangerous Female Honest
Every now and then we’re going to fail.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Every Failing Now Then
I don’t know, why am I called the opposite of what I am? It’s very confusing to me.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Confusing Knows Opposites
If you got a hit every third time that you went up to bat in the major leagues, you’d be the greatest hitter of all time. I think my average is a little better than that.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Average League Thinking
I’m not going to talk too much politics because I’m not smart enough to do that.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Enough Much Smart Too
If I make a joke about black people or Asian people or whatever, and then an Asian comes up to me afterwards and says, “That joke offended me,” I’m still more or less not going to listen, but at least it makes sense, like I said something that was about them.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Asian Black People
When a soldier of the night’s watch dies they say, “And now his watch is over.” That’s what they say when a comedian dies. They go, “And now his tour is done.”
BRAD WILLIAMS

Comedian Night Soldier
It’s weird when people ask me, “Why are you so nice?” It’s like, “Because that’s just what you should do. You should be kind to people.” It seems really basic, but it’s amazing how many people forget that.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Be Kind Nice People
There are things that I won’t joke about, but it’s not because I don’t think they’re funny or they can’t be made funny. It’s just that they don’t fit my particular skill set.
BRAD WILLIAMS

Apart Haer Joke Skills Thinking

When a soldier of the night’s watch dies they say, “And now his watch is over.” That’s what they say when a comedian dies. They go, “And now his tour is done.”

Related Topics

Popular Authors

When a soldier of the night’s watch dies they say, “And now his watch is over.” That’s what they say when a comedian dies. They go, “And now his tour is done.”

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Brad Williams Quotes