If you don’t wake up every day happy, change something.
BOB SAGET25, 30 years ago, that meant something, they were making some money. And they were doing all sorts of comedy, screaming at the audience, basically crowd control. And then there was the whole urban comedy scene.
More Bob Saget Quotes
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The squirrel in my yard really knows his way around the neighborhood.
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I don’t like to drink alone ’cause there’s nobody to fight with.
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I’m fortunate to know a lot of incredibly talented people, and they all want to be a penguin.
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Jon Lovitz. Jon, your act is like masturbation: you’re the only one who enjoys it, and you should be arrested for doing it in public.
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And turkeys are a bird. A very nervous bird. You’d be nervous too if you knew that one day you’d get your head cut off and… filled with stuffing.
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In the creative sense, I’m looking forward to collaborating with people I have mutual respect for to create some really good work.
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I was going to do a big radio show, and I said to my driver, ‘Radio can wait, take me to the Full House house.’ It literally was a drive-by.
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A lot of people ask me what my favorite episode of Full House was, I always tell them: it was the last one!
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It was a JOB; the video show was a JOB; you don’t tell the Aristocrats joke at 8 o’clock at night on network tv, it would be funny though. But those guys know I like dirty stuff, I like clean stuff too.
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My father once told me, and it’s stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.
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I love my mom! You can too for $12!
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What I have now are good problems of trying to decide and what I really want to do is good work next. My phone’s ringing a lot more and I’ve got nine lines so when it doesn’t ring, it’s very frustrating.
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Everyone I love I pay.
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I love watching people get hit in the crotch. But only if they get back up. If their teeth are bleeding, if they’re really hurt, if an ambulance has to come, I’m not laughing.
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When you’re famous, you’re always famous. It doesn’t go away.
BOB SAGET






