Nobody can tell me what I can or can’t do, except they can.
BOB SAGETMost people argue over who’s right, not about what the truth is.
More Bob Saget Quotes
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The nature of comedy is ‘just do it.’ But I think what’s interesting about it is this joke has been around and why. And it’s just saying what’s wrong and how wrong can you be if you say it.
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I become a chameleon for wherever I am.
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The selfish and usually pointless approach is to try to get both done simultaneously – accomplish your work at hand while begging forgiveness of those close to you while you’re basically working in front of them during what could’ve been specifically ‘quality time.’
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I just had a pedicure. My feet are soft like a baby’s behind. If his ass was covered in calluses.
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If I ever die, I want it to be cause I got hit by a car saving a kid.
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Sometimes I wish I hadn’t said something foolish. It is then that I realize the power of mime.
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My dad’s like, If your mom and I are having sex and we videotape it and she falls out of bed funny, can I win ten-thousand dollars?
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Sundays are a good day to look at the limitless possibilities of the week ahead. The key is to prolong that feeling by not reading the news.
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It’s 103 comedians, or however many it is, and how would everyone tell it. It’s enough people of substance that it makes you think of the people who aren’t there that are alive.
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Yet there are some people – Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he’s a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I’m doing it right now and you all seem bored.
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It’s okay to get stoned, as long as its not by other people.
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I don’t like to drink alone ’cause there’s nobody to fight with.
BOB SAGET -
Words matter. Especially ones with four letters.
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What do you do if you’re in the car and your girlfriend touches your crotch then asks you to remind her to get kitchen scissors?
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My favorite Dylan song? I think it’s ‘Just Like a Woman.’ It always makes me cry.
BOB SAGET