I wouldn’t hurt a flea. I’d finger a spider though.
BOB SAGETMost people argue over who’s right, not about what the truth is.
More Bob Saget Quotes
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I think when you dissect a joke too much, you have ruined whatever there is in comedy.
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If you’re hanging out with two negative people, do they equal one positive person?
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I was going to do a big radio show, and I said to my driver, ‘Radio can wait, take me to the Full House house.’ It literally was a drive-by.
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If you’re a host of a video show and you’re on the cleanest show on television for eight years, people want to say, ‘Well, that’s what that person does.’ That was the dilemma for me, career-wise.
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A lot of people ask me what my favorite episode of Full House was, I always tell them: it was the last one!
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I don’t roll like that but I’ve never been with a hooker either. Yeah, that’s good to say in an interview cause I feel bad a little because people grew up watching me and that’s a little disturbing.
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It was a JOB; the video show was a JOB; you don’t tell the Aristocrats joke at 8 o’clock at night on network tv, it would be funny though. But those guys know I like dirty stuff, I like clean stuff too.
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A good way to keep your relationship together is not to scream in terror when you see your partner naked.
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You learn who your friends are when you find out who will lie for you.
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I’m doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it’s fantastic and it makes me very happy. I’m dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I’m working on a new tv show for cable and it’s not set up yet.
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My haircutter figured out I whine less if I’m under general anesthesia. I just hope when I awaken they haven’t given me a Brazilian wax.
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It’s so nice to share a day as beautiful as this one with hundreds of thousands of reckless drivers.
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It’s 103 comedians, or however many it is, and how would everyone tell it. It’s enough people of substance that it makes you think of the people who aren’t there that are alive.
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I will always prefer a hardback book, but I’m drawn to digital because it’s so easy to acquire them when I’m having a need-to-read moment.
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They say, Keep your enemies closer. But what if you live with them?
BOB SAGET






