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I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn’t get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn’t join a biker club.

Bob Saget

My mom told me she thinks a man in the market felt her up today. I asked, Where did he touch you? She said, On my knee, Bobby.
BOB SAGET

Mom Thinking Today Told
I will always prefer a hardback book, but I’m drawn to digital because it’s so easy to acquire them when I’m having a need-to-read moment.
BOB SAGET

Book Digital Needs
If you don’t wake up every day happy, change something.
BOB SAGET

Change Something Things Wake
Bob Saget was known, in the comedy clubs in those days, as extremely funny but with dark humor. It was always an inside joke among comics, when he got Full House, it was, like, wow, hes playing this all-American dad kind of thing.
BOB SAGET

Dad Dark House
I’m psyched about what I can contribute that can be meaningful to myself and to others.
BOB SAGET

Meaningful Myself Physical
Wise men say, only fools rush in. Wise men are so slow.
BOB SAGET

Fool Men Wise
My mom just told me it’s impossible to know what’s going to happen in life. Except with breakfast, cause she eats the same thing every day.
BOB SAGET

Breakfast Causes Mom
I become a chameleon for wherever I am.
BOB SAGET

Become Chameleon Whenever
My haircutter figured out I whine less if I’m under general anesthesia. I just hope when I awaken they haven’t given me a Brazilian wax.
BOB SAGET

Anesthesia Given Havens
No one gets a free ride. Except maybe bus drivers.
BOB SAGET

Bus Driver Drivers
A lot of the comedians don’t even tell the joke. Like only three tell the joke, the rest of them dissect it.
BOB SAGET

Comedian Jokes Three
Some people rely on rumors and gossip because they are devoid of any original thought.
BOB SAGET

Gossip People Rumor
I’m fortunate to know a lot of incredibly talented people, and they all want to be a penguin.
BOB SAGET

Penguins People Want
Nothing worse than a piece of dried out fish.
BOB SAGET

Fishes Nothing Pieces
I am stressed because once I am flattened out so thin to be able to slide under a doorway, I may never be able to ever be unflattened so I could be regular sized again.
BOB SAGET

Doorways May Stressed Unflattered
Words matter. Especially ones with four letters.
BOB SAGET

Four Letters Matter

I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn’t get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn’t join a biker club.

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I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn’t get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn’t join a biker club.

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Popular Authors

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