The squirrel in my yard really knows his way around the neighborhood.
BOB SAGETIf you’re a host of a video show and you’re on the cleanest show on television for eight years, people want to say, ‘Well, that’s what that person does.’ That was the dilemma for me, career-wise.
More Bob Saget Quotes
-
-
I don’t like to drink alone ’cause there’s nobody to fight with.
BOB SAGET -
I have the brain of a German Shepherd and the body of a 16-year-old boy; they’re both in my car and I want you to see them
BOB SAGET -
Not a lot of people have done this. Stop It. This is why. You can cauterize your asshole shut, so when you fart it has nowhere to go and you can have a fart attack.
BOB SAGET -
I have a feeling I’m going to wake up one day and say ‘I can’t do dirty stuff anymore, I want to go all clean.’ I’ll do clean stuff too, I like to entertain people. Then they egged me on; we shot it at The Laugh Factory.
BOB SAGET -
I think comedy is on an organic upsurge right now because when I started, it was 1978 at The Comedy Store and Letterman had just stopped emceeing his morning show.
BOB SAGET -
It’s okay to get stoned, as long as its not by other people.
BOB SAGET -
Stop It, stop lighting your butthol on fire, and everybody listen to me. If you light your ass on fire, I hope you have boxers or a filter of somekind, because if your a bareass person.
BOB SAGET -
I don’t censor myself, but I don’t want to force my sick-skewed version of the world, either.
BOB SAGET -
I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn’t get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn’t join a biker club.
BOB SAGET -
Some people rely on rumors and gossip because they are devoid of any original thought.
BOB SAGET -
I just had a pedicure. My feet are soft like a baby’s behind. If his ass was covered in calluses.
BOB SAGET -
I love telling stories and acting and entertaining people. I don’t want to make fun of people.
BOB SAGET -
A lot of people ask me what my favorite episode of Full House was, I always tell them: it was the last one!
BOB SAGET -
25, 30 years ago, that meant something, they were making some money. And they were doing all sorts of comedy, screaming at the audience, basically crowd control. And then there was the whole urban comedy scene.
BOB SAGET -
I’m completely changing my diet. My nutritionist recommends I must now stop eating food I have already eliminated.
BOB SAGET