Women are like fingers and toes because they’re easy to count on.
BO BURNHAMI’d really love to make something that doesn’t involve my stupid face.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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I work really hard on the shows and I think the shows speak for themselves. I don’t want to construct the show to prove something.
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I’ve been doin’ drive-bys all of my life. Except the bullets are newspapers, the car is my bike.
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People give me money and I don’t know why, my real collection plate is an empty cup held by a homeless guy.
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Poetic talent is really easy to fake when thy sentences doth no f-king sense make.
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Drugs kill, just like cancer. So don’t smoke… tumors.
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Comedy is the one absolutely self-aware art form. Actually, hip-hop’s another one, I suppose. Because in your songs you’re talking about how good a hip-hop artist you are. It’s like a painter painting a panting of himself painting a painting.
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I think comedy has a range, with multiple peaks in different areas. It’s like trying to compare Beethoven and the Beatles. Sometimes I hear from people, ‘I think you try too hard in your comedy.’ And that’s what I worry about.
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Is there anything better than pussy? Yeah, a really good book.
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I’m friends with a lot of comedians, but we don’t talk about material. Most comedians I know don’t watch a lot of other comedy.
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Do unto others as you would have them do to you, said the rapist.
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I’m bored way too easily. I’m staring at screens half the day. I need to be overstimulated. And how will that express itself artistically?
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If your belief is hateful towards people, I couldn’t respect that.
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Bitches and hoes don’t exist because the hoes know Bo’s a feminist.
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I’m not a grown up until everybody realises I’m a grown up. When everyone remembers me as the dirty kid singing little songs I am the dirty little kid.
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Quotes are for dumb people who can’t think of something intelligent to say on their own.
BO BURNHAM