If I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I’d still say no.
BO BURNHAMI’m not a grown up until everybody realises I’m a grown up. When everyone remembers me as the dirty kid singing little songs I am the dirty little kid.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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My persona is most importantly just to communicate the material in a way that is most funny and meaningful in the moment. It’s more like a character that’s sculpted for whatever joke needs communicating at the moment.
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In the distance, Bo saw a fairy. A fairy so beautiful that he felt proud of being called one in highschool.
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I think the love-hate is fundamental. Everyone hates reality television, and everyone’s watching it. Everyone hates Facebook, and everyone is on it.
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When life gets you down, make a comforter!
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I feel more like I’m doing a play whose main character just happens to share my name.
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We’re having a traditional Thanksgiving – turkey, mashed potatoes, hat buckles, smallpox, genocide, a blue corn moon, etc.
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I worked eight hours a day just so I could get into the college of my dreams and say that I got in – and I never went.
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My persona on stage was always coming from a place of I know better than you and I’m going to be a little bit pretentious in your face with these sort of crass ideas.
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There’s a metal train that a mile long and at the very back end a lightning bolt struck her. How long til it reaches and kills the driver, provided that he’s a good conductor?
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Poverty. Racism. Isn’t it strange, only the homeless are begging for change?
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I’m gay for Jesus, fill me with your grace. Pour your love all over me, but please aim away from my face.
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You love the people that give you money and attention? Of course you do, that’s not selfless that you love your fans, that’s ridiculous.
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I’m interested in taboos for certain reasons. They can dramatise things and they’re scary, and they’re important to think about.
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My work is trying to at least define myself on my own terms, and then if other people enjoy things that’s a lovely addition.
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I chose to do comedy instead of going to college.
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I remember being superyoung, like nine or ten years old, and thinking, ‘Man, I wonder what famous people eat for breakfast.
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If comedy is about surprises, about tension, there’s a lot of tension and surprise there, in the fact that people are expecting this to be natural.
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The world doesn’t need any more hot chicks or tough guys or smooth talkers – the world needs more you. And don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
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Is there anything better than pussy? Yeah, a really good book.
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Quotes are for dumb people who can’t think of something intelligent to say on their own.
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Happy Thanksgiving! I broke into Best Buy and stole a copy of Pocahontas to celebrate.
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When things [writing] are over, I always think, ‘well, I’m never going to do anything again because I have no ideas so I’m going to go be a farmer’. Or else ideas will come and and if not then I become a farmer. Hopefully won’t happen.
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I know it’s the comedian’s instinct to say, “Do it, man, nothing’s off-limits! It’s cool, bro!” I don’t know if that’s the answer for me.
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I love you like a gay geneticist loves designer genes.
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I’m bored way too easily. I’m staring at screens half the day. I need to be overstimulated. And how will that express itself artistically?
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Bitches and hoes don’t exist because the hoes know Bo’s a feminist.
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