We don’t devote enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks.
BILL WATTERSONThe world of a comic strip ought to be a special place with its own logic and life… I don’t want the issue of Hobbes’s reality settled by a doll manufacturer.
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.
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Calvin: Sometimes when I’m talking, my words can’t keep up with my thoughts. I wonder why we can think faster than we speak? Hobbes: Probably so we can think twice.
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[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble] Calvin: Ha! I’ve got a great word and it’s on a “Double word score” box! Hobbes: “ZQFMGB” isn’t a word! It doesn’t even have a vowel! Calvin: It is so a word! It’s a worm found in New Guinea!
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Calvin: Why are you crying mom? Mom: I’m cutting up an onion. Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.
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It’s going to be a grim day when the world is run by a generation that doesn’t know anything but what it’s seen on TV.
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County library? Reference desk, please. Hello? Yes, I need a word definition. Well, that’s the problem.
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Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?
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It’s a cruel season that makes you get ready for bed while it’s light out.
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Things are never quite as scary when you’ve got a best friend.
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Ah, the life of a newspaper cartoonist – how I miss the groupies, drugs and trashed hotel rooms!
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I think nighttime is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction.
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I can never enjoy Sundays, because in the back of my mind I always know I’ve got to go to school the next day. It’s like trying to enjoy your last meal before the execution.
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What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn’t want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you’d cheat!
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Calvin: ME TARZAN! KING OF JUNGLE! Suzy: Nice underpants. Does your mom know you’re over here like this? Calvin:…I don’t think Jane EVER said that to Tarzan.
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The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.
BILL WATTERSON