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I’ve got plenty of common sense! I just choose to ignore it.

Bill Watterson

I hate to think that all my current experiences will someday become stories with no point.
BILL WATTERSON

Hate Point Stories Thinking
Now if a joke is in bad taste or it’s not funny, okay, that’s awhole different thing, but how you craft a joke is really what the writer’s job is, and I don’t think that technique should be subject to any editorial constraints.
BILL WATTERSON

Craft Different Editorial Joke Taste Technique
If you can’t control your peanut butter, you can’t expect to control your life.
BILL WATTERSON

Butter Control Funny Life Peanut
God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.
BILL WATTERSON

Accomplish Funny Life Motivational Nothing
The way Calvin’s brain is wired, you can almost hear the fuses blowing.
BILL WATTERSON

Brain Hobbies Way
Hobbes: How come we play war and not peace? Calvin: Too few role models.
BILL WATTERSON

Peace Play War
You mix a bunch of ingredients, and once in a great while, chemistry happens.
BILL WATTERSON

Chemistry Design Ingredients
County library? Reference desk, please. Hello? Yes, I need a word definition. Well, that’s the problem.
BILL WATTERSON

Definitions Desk Library Needs Reference
I liked things better when I didn’t understand them.
BILL WATTERSON

Liked Thing Understand
Hello Dad! It is now three in the morning. Do you know where I am?
BILL WATTERSON

Dad Morning Three
On the other hand, the mass media is disintegrating, and audiences are atomizing. I suspect comics will have less widespread cultural impact and make a lot less money.
BILL WATTERSON

Cultural Disintegrating Impact Less Money
And it will be even more exciting if anyone pays for them. It’s hard to charge admission without a gate.
BILL WATTERSON

Admission Anyone Exciting Gate More
Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
BILL WATTERSON

Command Information Thorough Useless
Animals aren’t conditional about friendships. Animals like you just the way you are. They listen to your problems, they comfort you when you’re sad, and all they ask in return is a little kindness.
BILL WATTERSON

Animal Ask Friendship Kindness Problem
You know, maybe we don’t need enemies.” “Yeah, best friends aree about all I can take.
BILL WATTERSON

Enemy Maybe Needs Take Yeah
If you can’t win by reason, go for volume.
BILL WATTERSON

Reason Volume Winning

I’ve got plenty of common sense! I just choose to ignore it.

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I’ve got plenty of common sense! I just choose to ignore it.

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Popular Authors

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