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You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.

Bill Watterson

It’s going to be a grim day when the world is run by a generation that doesn’t know anything but what it’s seen on TV.
BILL WATTERSON

Generation Running World
Of course, REAL zombies never get the giggles when they look at each other.
BILL WATTERSON

Looks Other Real Zombie
Now if a joke is in bad taste or it’s not funny, okay, that’s awhole different thing, but how you craft a joke is really what the writer’s job is, and I don’t think that technique should be subject to any editorial constraints.
BILL WATTERSON

Craft Different Editorial Joke Taste Technique
I’m a misunderstood genius.” “What’s misunderstood?” “Nobody thinks I’m a genius.
BILL WATTERSON

Genius Misunderstood Thinking
I’m learning skills I will use for the rest of my life by doing homework…procrastinating and negotiation.
BILL WATTERSON

Homework Negotiation Procrastinating Skills Use
I’d like to see cartoonists measuring their work by higher standards than how many papers their strips are in and how much money they make.
BILL WATTERSON

Higher Paper Standards
I don’t enjoy lettering very much, but that’s the way I write and that belongs in the strip because the strip is a reflection of me.
BILL WATTERSON

Lettering Reflection Way Writing
I’m killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.
BILL WATTERSON

Happiness Inspirational Life
Everybody I know fails the acid test of friendship.
BILL WATTERSON

Acid Failing Tests
There are no restrictions of taste, approach, or subject matter. The gatekeepers are gone, so the prospect for new and different voices is exciting. Or at least it will be if anyone reads them.
BILL WATTERSON

Different Gatekeepers Gone Prospects Voice
Calvin: ME TARZAN! KING OF JUNGLE! Suzy: Nice underpants. Does your mom know you’re over here like this? Calvin:…I don’t think Jane EVER said that to Tarzan.
BILL WATTERSON

Country Kings Mom Nice People Think
It’s gratifying to hear that from people who care about comic art. I never know what to make of it when someone writes to say, “Calvin and Hobbes is the best strip in the paper. I like it even more than Nancy.”
BILL WATTERSON

Art Gratifying People Someone Write Writing
I can never enjoy Sundays, because in the back of my mind I always know I’ve got to go to school the next day. It’s like trying to enjoy your last meal before the execution.
BILL WATTERSON

Enjoy School Smock Sunday
Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.
BILL WATTERSON

Bad Helping Mood
When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.
BILL WATTERSON

Fun Giving Hilarious
Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.
BILL WATTERSON

Command Information Thorough Useless

You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.

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You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.

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