“Sometimes you have to make your own opportunities, and that’s why I’m on TV. I wasn’t going to sit around anymore, waiting for the damn phone to ring. I had to create my own place – I’ve always done that.”

I never know how much of what I say is true.

We’re all divine, but I was the only one who had the nerve to call myself that.

Sold my soul. Bought these devil chains.

I want it all – and I would like it delivered.

It’s important that you all agree on what the parameters are and what you can accomplish – and not get pissed off or beat yourself up for what you can’t accomplish.

Me, I’m just a hack. I’m just a schlep-per. I just do what I can do.

You can’t just have a clean public space – you also have to have people willing to use it, and something that will draw them in.

I think the essence of humor has not changed. It’s all about surprise, facilitating follows. But the context of humor has changed.

The Internet has changed everything. People will be discovered online. People buy music online. It’s a completely different way to get entertainment.

Self-esteem is something you have to earn! The only way to achieve self-esteem is to work hard. People have an obligation to live up to their potential.

I’d make a wonderful Lady Macbeth. I’ll wear a pair of platform shoes or something.

I think most of us are torn. We have at least two people at war in our body. One person wants to retire and grow fabulous tomatoes, and the other wants to stand up on a pedestal and be worshipped and get bigger and bigger and bigger until she explodes.

Do you want to live and work in a garbage dump? I don’t. That’s partly because I grew up in the most pristine environment possible – Hawaii, where it is sacrilege to leave your garbage on the ground.

All these rumors about [Tom Cruise] being gay. I don’t believe it. I don’t believe it for one minute. He hasn’t been to one of my shows.

My parents taught me: Do not rely on a man. Not rely on it that you get married and it pays for you. That’s what I figured. I have always paid my own bills.

I had no idea of being a star, all I knew was that I wanted to be a great actress, I wanted to work as an actress. So I thought the way I would be a great actress was to sing and dance first.

There are things you just can’t do in life. You can’t beat the phone company, you can’t make a waiter see you until he’s ready to see you, and you can’t go home again.

What I have now are good problems of trying to decide and what I really want to do is good work next. My phone’s ringing a lot more and I’ve got nine lines so when it doesn’t ring, it’s very frustrating.

BTW A 24 week old embryo is not a human being. You’re not a human being until you’re in my phone book.

You can tell how boring a person is by the lack of fear in their eyes when someone is flipping through photos on their phone.

I get on Twitter, one of my routines during the day, if I’m home is, I wake up, get a cup of coffee, turn on the Weather Channel and I’ll look at what people are saying to me on Twitter on my phone.

I am out in public and using the phone. I am in a phone booth, got the phone in my hand and a man taps on the glass and says You using the phone? Nope, I’m superman, i am just looking for my costume. Here’s your sign!

I find that if I use my time well and take care of my mind/body when I’m outside of work, then I feel more supported throughout my day. So, instead of waking up and going straight for my cell phone or running to the gym.

You’re not a human till you’re in my phone book. There. My hat is now in the political ring.