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I haven’t left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection! Either way we’re screwed!

Bette Midler

I wouldn’t say I invented tacky, but I definitely brought it to its present high popularity.
BETTE MIDLER

Memorable Women
It’s the one who won’t be taken that cannot seem to give, and the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live.
BETTE MIDLER

Dance Fear Philosophy
Men’s brains are smaller than those of women so they can fit into their penises.
BETTE MIDLER

Brain Fit Men
Honey, I can smell the scent of another woman from 500 paces.
BETTE MIDLER

Infidelity Pace Smell
I think the essence of humor has not changed. It’s all about surprise, facilitating follows. But the context of humor has changed.
BETTE MIDLER

Essence Issues Thinking
My daughter very independent. But if she’s upset about something, she will absolutely let me know. She’s great – a real tough cookie.
BETTE MIDLER

Daughter Independent Real
When it’s time to shuffle off this mortal coil, you leave your ashes to be composted.
BETTE MIDLER

Ashes Mortals Shuffle
Image is everything, and the voice or the idea or the song is hardly anything at all. Half the time the person isn’t even doing the singing. I’m a bit cynical about this [music] business.
BETTE MIDLER

Ideas Song Voice
Let the sun stop burning, Let them tell me love’s not worth going through. If it all falls apart, I will know deep in my heart, The only dream that mattered had come true …In this life I was loved by you.
BETTE MIDLER

Life Love Romantic
Life is like cooking your masterpiece recipe. You have to get the right ingredients,have the right mixture and the right cooking time to reveal the PERFECT and DELICIOUS TASTE of your craft.
BETTE MIDLER

Cooking Life Perfect
If only I’d known my differentness would be an asset, then my earlier life would have been much easier.
BETTE MIDLER

Actresses Being Different Singers
I’m not interested in perfection. The universe is perfect, and there are some works of art that we see as perfect, but human beings aren’t perfect.
BETTE MIDLER

Art Interested Not Perfect
Some say love, it is a razor that leaves your soul to bleed.
BETTE MIDLER

Broken Heart Love Soul
For days on end, I would hardly speak, and when I did only the vilest sort of gibberish would spout forth. I became morose and fat. Unapproachable, except when eating – and then only by waiters.
BETTE MIDLER

Depression Eating Speak
It’s a different world now: Stars come and go quickly, and there are so many of them. I read a statistic that all the record companies combined used to put out around 3,000 albums in a year. Now they put out something like 30,000!
BETTE MIDLER

Different Stars Years
I never know how much of what I say is true.
BETTE MIDLER

Cynicism Funny Truth
A lot of people have no access to beauty. When I was growing up, my mother had only a few pretty things to look at.
BETTE MIDLER

Grow Up Mother People
Find your Light; They can’t love you if they can’t see you
BETTE MIDLER

Light Love You See
Rap is poetry set to music. But to me it’s like a jackhammer.
BETTE MIDLER

Jakhammer Poetry Rap
The [film] industry is an ecosystem that’s sick.
BETTE MIDLER

Ecosystems Movie Sick
My idea of superwoman is someone who scrubs her own floors.
BETTE MIDLER

Cleaning Ideas Superwoman
When the movies first started, audiences were dumbstruck to see actresses walking around in evening gowns. They’d never seen anything like that. They wanted to be like those actors and actresses, so the movies informed their behavior.
BETTE MIDLER

Drinking People Smoking
I read neither good nor bad about me. I let it not even in my life, so it has no effect on me. I am very sensitive.
BETTE MIDLER

Effect Good Read Sensitive
One of my first role models was Eugene Lang, a wealthy businessman who went back to his elementary school in East Harlem and addressed the sixth-grade class. He looked out at that sea of faces and said, “If any of you wants to go to college, I will pay for it.”
BETTE MIDLER

College Kids School
You can’t just have a clean public space – you also have to have people willing to use it, and something that will draw them in.
BETTE MIDLER

People Space Use
hen you’re in your third adulthood, the one that leads to the grave, and you ask yourself, “What will I do between now and then?” Instead of thinking in terms of glamour, you start thinking in terms of reform – your contribution to the world.
BETTE MIDLER

Ask Glamorous Grave Think Yourself
You have to be alert. When my daughter, Sophie, came out of the womb, she was instantly alert, as if she had been here before. And she was a little disappointed that she was here again.
BETTE MIDLER

Daughter Littles Sophie

I haven’t left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection! Either way we’re screwed!

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Popular Authors

I haven’t left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection! Either way we’re screwed!

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bette Midler Quotes