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I think the essence of humor has not changed. It’s all about surprise, facilitating follows. But the context of humor has changed.

Bette Midler

My parents have not insisted that we go to college, but she wanted us to learn. Teacher, librarian, secretary, nurse. All my siblings were employed. But I wanted to be the boss, an independent contractor.
BETTE MIDLER

Independent Sibling Teacher
I’ve always said that people have unrealistic expectations.
BETTE MIDLER

Expectations People Unrealistic
If they [at the audition] don’t like the way you sound they won’t buy you anyway, ripped dress or no ripped dress, ass hanging out or no ass hanging out.
BETTE MIDLER

Dresses Sound Way
For days on end, I would hardly speak, and when I did only the vilest sort of gibberish would spout forth. I became morose and fat. Unapproachable, except when eating – and then only by waiters.
BETTE MIDLER

Depression Eating Speak
After thirty, a body has a mind of its own.
BETTE MIDLER

Age Birthday Funny Mind
If you’re passionate about something, then you should pick up your flag and run with it.
BETTE MIDLER

Flag Passionate Running
Cats always seem so very wise, when staring with their half-closed eyes. Can they be thinking, I’ll be nice, and maybe she will feed me twice?
BETTE MIDLER

Funny Nice Wise
Most people don’t deserve to be spoken of in the same breath as Chaplin or Lucille Ball.
BETTE MIDLER

Balls People
I try not to drink too much because when I’m drunk, I bite.
BETTE MIDLER

Drinking Drunk Perspective
I wish America would spend even half as much time complaining about plastics in our oceans as we do about actresses’ plastic surgery.
BETTE MIDLER

Country Ocean Wish
[On Princess Anne:] Such an active, outdoorsy lass. She loves nature in spite of what it did to her.
BETTE MIDLER

Princess Royalty Spite
I firmly believe that with the right footwear one can rule the world.
BETTE MIDLER

Believe Fashion World
Some say love it is a river that drowns the tender reeds. Some say love, it is a razor that leaves your heart to bleed. Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need. I say love, it is a flower and you, its only seed.
BETTE MIDLER

Flower Heart River
I always look old when I work because I get so upset and tense that my face wrinkles up like a prune, I can’t stop it.
BETTE MIDLER

Pruned Tense Upset
If someone were to say seriously, “I’m divine,” she’d have to be locked up. There are lots of people in mental institutions going around saying “I’m God.” But because I’m funny about it, they haven’t locked me up yet. And I don’t give myself airs, either.
BETTE MIDLER

Air Giving People
The worst part of success is to try to find someone who is happy for you.
BETTE MIDLER

Funny Jealousy Success

I think the essence of humor has not changed. It’s all about surprise, facilitating follows. But the context of humor has changed.

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I think the essence of humor has not changed. It’s all about surprise, facilitating follows. But the context of humor has changed.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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