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When you’re offstage, that’s the footprint. That’s the man God’s gonna judge.

Bernie Mac

I don’t ever watch myself. By watching, you try to perfect yourself, become a robot.
BERNIE MAC

Perfect Robot Trying
It was rough being dark. I got heat from my own people more than anyone else. I remember going to my mom and saying, ‘Why am I so black?’ And she said, ‘Because I’m black. You just gotta always work harder than the average bear.’
BERNIE MAC

Dark Hard Heart Mom Rough Work
I hate to compare anything, especially while I’m promoting. I feel that’s another disrespect, but ‘Ocean’s 13’ is the best movie I’ve ever done in my life. No question.
BERNIE MAC

Another Disrespect Feel Hate Ocean
Suffering is a good teacher. It keeps you in its grip until you’ve learned your lesson.
BERNIE MAC

Lesson Suffering Teacher
That’s the whole key to anything: Don’t be afraid to fail. And is not afraid to fail.
BERNIE MAC

Afraid Anything Fail Failing Keys
Why do people love Richard Pryor so much? ‘Cause he had problems.
BERNIE MAC

Causes People Problem
My daughter was a beautiful child.
BERNIE MAC

Beautiful Children Daughter
I always wanted to scuba dive. I used to scuba dive undercover like black Aquaman.
BERNIE MAC

Black Country Scuba Used
I’ve introduced myself with comedy, and once you’ve introduced yourself as something, that’s where people keep you. That’s where people like to hold you.
BERNIE MAC

Comedy Introduces Myself People
I want to have fun. Life ain’t no dress rehearsal. I want to have fun. I’m a comedian; I ain’t no politician. So everything I do is with humor, with love.
BERNIE MAC

Comedian Dresses Everything Fun
You have to meet all of the challenges, big and small. Because how you start is how you finish.
BERNIE MAC

Big Challenges Motivational
I became the storyteller of South Side Chicago. I used an old Kiwi liquid shoe polish as a microphone. I’d go around the house interviewing everybody, telling stupid jokes, doing voices. I mimicked Sidney Poitier, Sammy Davis Jr., people on ‘Laugh-In,’ Flip Wilson.
BERNIE MAC

Around Shoes South Stupid Voice
I love who I am. I love what I’ve become.
BERNIE MAC

Become Create Love
America…Do not touch my TV, my DVD, my stereo, my dual-deck VCR. Do not touch my old school, my new school, my slow jams, my party jams, my happy rap, and you better not touch…My James Brown.
BERNIE MAC

Country Party Rap School Touch
Stand-up is what I am; stand-up is what made me.
BERNIE MAC

Made Stand
Okay, first rule of this carpool. No breaking wind in my car. The only gas that Bernie Mac want to be smelling is unleaded.
BERNIE MAC

Car Unreal Want Wind

When you’re offstage, that’s the footprint. That’s the man God’s gonna judge.

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When you’re offstage, that’s the footprint. That’s the man God’s gonna judge.

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Popular Authors

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