Stand-up is what I am; stand-up is what made me.
BERNIE MACI’ve never been no superficial cat.
More Bernie Mac Quotes
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I’m not ashamed to tell the truth about what happened in my family. I think that’s what makes my comedy different.
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I have Glocks, .45s, Berettas, Remingtons. I like the marksmanship and the discipline that it takes to be a gun owner. I like the machinery. Being able to take it out and clean it is even more fascinating than having the gun.
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You don’t see me in Los Angeles a lot. I go back home. Because I can’t play the game. I can’t – my tolerance – I know I’m getting old; I’ll be 50 this year. And you know how I know I’m getting old? ‘Cause my tolerance level is low.
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Okay, first rule of this carpool. No breaking wind in my car. The only gas that Bernie Mac want to be smelling is unleaded.
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I had to do clubs where street gangs were, had to do motorcycle gangs, gay balls and things of that nature.
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I want to have fun. Life ain’t no dress rehearsal. I want to have fun. I’m a comedian; I ain’t no politician. So everything I do is with humor, with love.
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Suffering is a good teacher. It keeps you in its grip until you’ve learned your lesson.
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My family are police officers, detectives. My brother Mitch is FBI. Mitch is like that – a stern enforcer.
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Whatever you hear at the barber shop, stays at the barber shop.
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As I got older, I got into all kinds of things in the streets – but for some reason, I never got caught up with the gangs growing up. Everybody dug me, man. I never had problems.
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You have to meet all of the challenges, big and small. Because how you start is how you finish.
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My girlfriend Rhonda, who’s now my wife, I graduated from high school, she got pregnant. My grandfather said, ‘You’ve got to do the right thing.’
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You can’t change what happened. Just like you can’t change the future by worrying about it. You just have to keep moving.
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Why I was so intrigued with Red Skelton was because he was able to make you cry and laugh and the same time. That was power.
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I don’t need to pat myself on the back until my arm breaks. I don’t need any of that.
BERNIE MAC