“I don’t care about how I look; I’m dedicated to the laughs. You know, I used to be a clown, so – my name was Smoothie the Clown. All the training I had, all my training is geared toward making people laugh, and I didn’t care about being cool.”

I want to play a villain – I can’t wait to play a villain.

I’m an ordinary guy with an extraordinary job.

I don’t ever watch myself. By watching, you try to perfect yourself, become a robot.

I want to do something that people can really say, ‘Hey, man, that was good, I’m proud of you, I’m proud of that.’ ‘Pride’ and ‘Transformers’ and things like that.

I’ve never been no superficial cat.

Comedy has been so good to me.

Whatever success I’ve had, I always like to top it.

Jerry Weintraub, the producer, might be a pain in the ass, but he really knows how to treat his actors.

I hate to compare anything, especially while I’m promoting. I feel that’s another disrespect, but ‘Ocean’s 13’ is the best movie I’ve ever done in my life. No question.

That’s the whole key to anything: Don’t be afraid to fail. And is not afraid to fail.

I hate to let people down. I was like that in sports and I was like that in comedy. I was like that at work. When I worked General Motors and stuff like that, when I say something, I mean it.

You don’t see me in Los Angeles a lot. I go back home. Because I can’t play the game. I can’t – my tolerance – I know I’m getting old; I’ll be 50 this year. And you know how I know I’m getting old? ‘Cause my tolerance level is low.

Only way you can you get upset is when you expecting something.

I can’t build myself by beating somebody down.

I love my daughter, but there’s a certain feeling, a certain emotion when you got a granddaughter, you know?

If I can tell someone a story that makes them bend over and laugh, that’s bigger than anything else.

At around 19 I realized that I really didn’t have any skills other than making people laugh, so I should probably pursue it full-time.

Whenever I’ve been in rehearsals, it’s really fun, there’s always laughing.

I’m not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don’t even want them to laugh half the time.

It’s really about committing super-hard to whatever you’re trying to create. In essence, I’m just copying my favorite comedic actors, and it’s the people who make me laugh the hardest who commit the hardest.

We all look to have transcendent experiences that lift us out of the everyday, and fear is a good one. But, I think it’s the same reason why people want to laugh their heads off.

I just consider myself a piece of the puzzle and I’m lucky enough to be asked or invited to the party, if you will. I hope I can bring some laughs and grimaces to the fans.

My new shorty got a gymnastic back, ’87 emerald green on a classic Jag. She had the cleft palate, I ordered chef’s salad; She had the club foot, with that little arm, I couldn’t help but laugh…she ordered Chicken Parm.

We laugh at the efforts of the musk deer to find the source of the scent which comes from itself and despair at our efforts to find the peace which is our essence.