“So he’s above the law because he’s a celebrity or something. Just because you’re Russell Crowe doesn’t mean you can do whatever you like.”

Is there stop ‘n’ go counseling for couples on the run?

It’s as if they believe the invisible mike on the plastic menu screen is actually connected to a standup comedy stage somewhere in the recesses of the restaurant.

An intriguing mind is a powerful aphrodisiac.

the teenage zone: the stage when an adolescent’s brain synapses quit firing while the rest of their body races toward adulthood.

have you ever noticed how a man orders food at a fast-food drive-through window? … men have an innate desire to be cute while placing their order through the drive-through microphone.

There is in fact no such thing as art for art’s sake, art that stands above classes, art that is detached from or independent of politics. Proletarian literature and art are part of the whole proletarian revolutionary cause.

One can not be an American by going about saying that one is an American. It is necessary to feel America, like America, love America and then work.

Be amusing: never tell unkind stories; above all, never tell long ones.

It is the artist who realizes that there is a supreme force above him and works gladly away as a small apprentice under God’s heaven.

If you train your mind to search for the positive things about other people.

When Celtic get an opportunity to go above Rangers they’ve got to jump at it with both hands.

she kept sliding down, in small half-willing surrenders, till she was a heap, with the book held tiringly above her face.

Above literature?’ said the Queen. ‘Who is above literature? You might as well say one was above humanity.