“Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it.”

San Francisco would be a good location for a murder mystery.

A woman of mystery is one who also has a certain maturity and whose actions speak louder than words. Any woman can be one, if she keeps those two points in mind. She should grow up-and shut up.

It’s only a movie, and, after all, we’re all grossly overpaid.

Film your murders like love scenes, and film your love scenes like murders.

Puns are the highest form of literature.

For me, the cinema is not a slice of life, but a piece of cake.

I was an uncommonly unattractive young man.

The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.

Kicking is very important in football. In fact, some of the more enthusiastic players even kick the ball, occasionally.

I’m frightened of eggs, worse than frightened, they revolt me.

Even my failures make money and become classics a year after I make them.

Self-plagiarism is style.

Some of our most exquisite murders have been domestic, performed with tenderness in simple, homey places like the kitchen table.

I always try to look at things as though I were remembering them three years later.

A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it.

All love scenes started on the set are continued in the dressing room.

How can such scary looking parents create something so cute?

For someone who doesn’t even like love stories, I’ve played an awful lot of lovers.

I am writing a book. So far I have the pages numbered.

If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.

My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.

I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.