The nearest my parents came to alcohol was at Holy Communion and they utterly overestimated its effects.
ALAN BENNETTThere are more microbes per person than the entire population of the world.
More Alan Bennett Quotes
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f they’d been working with Alec Guinness, for instance, they wouldn’t have known they were born if they’d not towed the line!
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Imagine that. Per person. This means that if the time scale is diminished in proportion to that of space it would be quite possible for the whole story of Greece and Rome to be played out between farts.
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I was an only child. I lost both my parents. By the time I was twenty I was bald. I’m homosexual.
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Standards are always out of date. That’s what makes them standards.
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An article on playwrights in the Daily Mail , listed according to Hard Left,
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At the drabber moments of my life (swilling some excrement from the steps, for instance, or rooting with a bent coat-hanger down a blocked sink) thoughts occur like.
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Knowing as their own dusk falls that they will only be remembered for remembering someone else.
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I think the writer’s quite low down in the hierarchy really. But the fact that they took the piss out of Nicholas [Hynter] who, besides being the director, is also director of the National Theatre is, I’d have thought, slightly more risky.
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But then, when I did go, the contrast between Leeds, which was very black and sooty in those days, and Cambridge, which seemed like something out of a fairystory, in the grip of a hard frost, was just wonderful.
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Schweitzer in the Congo did not derive more moral credit than Larkin did for living in Hull.
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Nor did they seem to think one had done them a kindness by reading their writings. Rather they had done one the kindness by writing them.
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One of the hardest things for a teacher to learn is not to try and tell them.
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I tried to explain to her the significance of the great poet, but without much success,
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If you find yourself born in Barnsley and then set your sights on being Virginia Woolf it is not going to be roses all the way.
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At eighty things do not occur; they recur.
ALAN BENNETT