Nature played a cruel trick on her by giving her a waxed mustache.
ALAN BENNETTStandards are always out of date. That’s what makes them standards.
More Alan Bennett Quotes
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There’s very little in the substance of [THE LADY IN THE VAN] which is not fact though some adjustments have had to be made.
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I’m all in favour of free expression provided it’s kept rigidly under control.
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Knowing as their own dusk falls that they will only be remembered for remembering someone else.
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I was an only child. I lost both my parents. By the time I was twenty I was bald. I’m homosexual.
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Never read the Bible as if it means something. Or at any rate don’t try and mean it. Nor prayers.
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It’s like going to a place that you’ve never been to before – you’ve got a picture of it and then you go there and that picture is totally wiped out by the reality.
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Sometimes there is no next time, no time-outs, no second chances. Sometimes it’s now or never.
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I suppose I’m the only person who remembers one of the most exciting of his ballets-it’s the fruit of an unlikely collaboration between Nijinsky on the one hand and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle on the other.
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If I had to sum up my work, I suppose that’s it really: I’m taking the pith out of reality.
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At the drabber moments of my life (swilling some excrement from the steps, for instance, or rooting with a bent coat-hanger down a blocked sink) thoughts occur like.
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One reads for pleasure…it is not a public duty.
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Your whole life is on the other side of the glass. And there is nobody watching.
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You must take people as they come. Remember, too that though you will generally know more about the condition than the patient, it is the patient who has the condition and this if nothing else bestows on him or her a kind of wisdom.
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God doesn’t do notes, either. Did Jesus Christ say, “Can I be excused the Crucifixion?” No!
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If I am doing nothing, I like to be doing nothing to some purpose. That is what leisure means.
ALAN BENNETT