We need a refuge to shore up our states of mind, because so much of the world is opposed to our allegiances. We need our rooms to align us to desirable versions of ourselves and to keep alive the important, evanescent sides of us.
ALAIN DE BOTTONMost anger stems from feelings of weakness, sadness and fear: hard to remember when one is at the receiving end of its defiant roar.
More Alain de Botton Quotes
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…if the beginnings of love and amorous politics are equally rosy, then the ends may be equally bloody.
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What is fascinating about marriage is why anyone wants to get married.
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Without sex, we would be dangerously invulnerable. We might believe we were not ridiculous. We wouldn’t know rejection and humiliation so intimately.
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It is in dialogue with pain that many beautiful things acquire their value. Acquaintance with grief turns out to be one of the more unusual prerequisites of architectural appreciation. We might, quite aside from all other requirements, need to be a little sad before buildings can properly touch us.
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True respectability stems not from the will of the majority but from proper reasoning.
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Because the rhythm of conversation makes no allowance for dead periods, because the presence of others calls for continuous responses, we are left to regret the inanity of what we say, and the missed opportunity of what we do not.
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Those who divorce aren’t necessarily the most unhappy, just those neatly able to believe their misery is caused by one other person.
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Everyone returns us to a different sense of ourselves, for we become a little of who they think we are.
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Anyone who isn’t embarrassed of who they were last year probably isn’t learning enough.
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The largest part of what we call ‘personality’ is determined by how we’ve opted to defend ourselves against anxiety and sadness”.
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Intuition is unconscious accumulated experience informing judgement in real time.
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Curiosity takes ignorance seriously – and is confident enough to admit when it’s in the dark. It is aware of not knowing. And then it sets out to do something about it.
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Must being in love always mean being in pain?
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Only as we mature does affection begin to depend on achievement.
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I feel that the great challenge of our time is the communication of ideas.
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