You need a long hard day’s work to reveal the logic of the craving for very bad tv and alcohol.
ALAIN DE BOTTONThe only way to be happy is to realise how much depends on how you look at things
More Alain de Botton Quotes
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Every adult life could be said to be defined by two great love stories: the story of our quest for sexual love and the story of our quest for love from the world.
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I am in general a very pessimistic person with an optimistic, day to day take on things. The bare facts of life are utterly terrifying. And yet, one can laugh. Indeed, one has to laugh precisely because of the darkness: the nervous laughter of the trenches.
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Once I began to consider everything as being of potential interest, objects released latent layers of value.
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It is in dialogue with pain that many beautiful things acquire their value. Acquaintance with grief turns out to be one of the more unusual prerequisites of architectural appreciation. We might, quite aside from all other requirements, need to be a little sad before buildings can properly touch us.
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After 40 (old age for most of man’s history), one should strive to be more or less packed and ready to go were the end call to come.
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The mind may be reluctant to think properly when thinking is all it is supposed to do; the task can be as paralysing as having to tell a joke or mimic an accent on demand.
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Sweetness is the opposite of machismo, which is everywhere-and I really don’t get on with machismo. I’m interested in sensitivity, and weakness, and fear, and anxiety, because I think that, at the end of the day, behind our masks, that’s what we are.
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The flawless object throws into perspective the mediocrity that surrounds it. We are reminded of the way we would wish things always to be and of how incomplete our lives remain.
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To be shown love is to feel ourselves the object of concern: our presence is noted, our name is registered, our views are listened to, our failings are treated with indulgence and our needs are ministered to. And under such care, we flourish.
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Most of our childhood is stored not in photos, but in certain biscuits, lights of day, smells, textures of carpet.
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It is perhaps sad books that best console us when we are sad.
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It’s hard loving those who don’t much like themselves: “If you’re so great, why would you think I’m so great.
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In their different ways, art and philosophy help us, in Schopenhauer’s words, to turn pain into knowledge.
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Our sadness won’t be of the searing kind but more like a blend of joy and melancholy: joy at the perfection we see before us, melancholy at an awareness of how seldom we are sufficiently blessed to encounter anything of its kind.
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The mind does most of its best thinking when we aren’t there. The answers are there in the morning.
ALAIN DE BOTTON