The big secret about Art is that no one wants it to be true.
ADAM PHILLIPSThe child..will try to make himself..independent of other people. .
More Adam Phillips Quotes
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Tragic heroes are failed pragmatists. Their ends are unrealistic and their means are impractical.
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It is as if to say: if these are not valued – if these forms of wanting and feeling and speaking and doing – are not cultivated and encouraged and rewarded in the child, then the child will be mad.
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The past influences everything and dictates nothing.
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One thing you discover in psychoanalytic treatment is the limits of what you can change about yourself or your life.
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We are at our most stupid in our self-hatred.
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Everybody is dealing with how much of their own aliveness they can bear and how much they need to anesthetize themselves.
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To keep faith with recognition we have to stay recognizable.
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We are tyrannized by our blind spots, and by whatever it is about ourselves that we find unacceptable.
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Lovers, of course, are notoriously frantic epistemologists, second only to paranoiacs (and analysts) as readers of signs and wonders.
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People change, but there really are limits.
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The vocabulary of one’s self-criticism is so impoverished and clichéd.
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There is always a ..belief that by destroying the thing that we love we destroy our needs
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You write to find out what you believe.
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The child can find out what the object ..might be only by finding ..obstacles to its access
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To our grudge against our mothers; the way we never let our mothers off the hook for their not meeting our every need.
ADAM PHILLIPS