Surprise is the essence of humor, and nothing is more surprising than truth.
BILL WATTERSONReading those turgid philosophers here in these remote stone buildings may not get you a job, but if those books have forced you to ask yourself questions about what makes life truthful, purposeful, meaningful, and redeeming.
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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Calvin: Trick or treat! Adult: Where’s your costume? What are you supposed to be? Calvin: I’m yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet.
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It’s psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I’ll get a saw.
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I let my mind wander and it didn’t come back.
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A box of new crayons! Now they’re all pointy, lined up in order, bright and perfect. Soon they’ll be a bunch of ground down, rounded, indistinguishable stumps, missing their wrappers and smudged with other colors. Sometimes life seems unbearably tragic.
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We don’t devote enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks.
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My problem is that I don’t paint ambitiously. It’s all catch and release – just tiny fish that aren’t really worth the trouble to clean and cook.
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You have the Swiss Army Knife of mental tools, and it’s going to come in handy all the time.
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Know what’s weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything’s different.
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And it will be even more exciting if anyone pays for them. It’s hard to charge admission without a gate.
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Suddenly, we realize our time in here is fleeting. Is our quick experience here pointless?
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When birds burp, it must taste like bugs.
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Animals aren’t conditional about friendships. Animals like you just the way you are. They listen to your problems, they comfort you when you’re sad, and all they ask in return is a little kindness.
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A day can really slip by when you’re deliberately avoiding what you’re supposed to do.
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Reality continues to ruin my life.
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Life is like topography, Hobbes. There are summits of happiness and success, flat stretches of boring routine and valleys of frustration and failure.
BILL WATTERSON






