What did moths bump into before the electric light bulb was invented? Boy, the lightbulb really screwed the moth up didn’t it? Are there moths on their way to the sun now going, It’s gonna be worth it!.
BILL HICKSPot is a better drug than alcohol. I’ll prove it to you. You’re at a ball game or a concert, and someone’s really violent and agressive and obnoxious, are they drunk or are they smoking pot?
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
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Marijuana: a drug that kills … no one – and let’s put it in a time frame – ever. Illegal.
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What before seemed a…frustrating wall, the comic deftly and fearlessly steps through, proving the absurdity of it all.
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You’re not a human till you’re in my phone book. There. My hat is now in the political ring.
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God has this…hobby. He creates perfection. This world is not perfect. We have to learn to separate illusions from reality.
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I can’t watch TV longer than five minutes without praying for nuclear holocaust.
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I left in love, in laughter, and in truth, and wherever truth, love and laughter abide, I am there in spirit.
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I’m very tired of staring out into your vacant faces looking back at me. Wanting to fill your empty lives with humor you couldn’t possibly think of yourself… Good evening!
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I used to love to call L.A. when I lived in New York… Is that the Big One I hear in the background? Bye, you lizard scum! Bye!
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What’s gonna happen to the arms industry when we realize we’re all one. Ha ha ha ha ha! It’s gonna fuck up the economy!
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I was in Australia….Lotta leg room down under. Apartments: dollar a month. 2000-acre den….think of the parties.
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I wish I could meet a Christian who would proselytize to me, but they keep running away from me. I wanna talk to you all.
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Life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.
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I’m just skin covering coffee and some real nervous teeth.
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I guess what surprised me the most was the discrepancy in casualties: Iraq, one hundred fifty thousand casualties, USA: seventy-nine!
BILL HICKS







