“In the 50 years I’ve spent helping people to overcome illness, disability and disease, it has become crystal clear that poor bowel management lies at the root of most peoples’ health problems.”

In times past, knowledge of the bowel was more widespread and people were taught how to care for the bowel.

That cactus went right through my eye. It left my eye flat. They took me to a doctor, and he said, ‘We’ll have to take the eye out.’ …I fought like a tiger. I said, ‘No! Leave the eye alone.

If we lived correctly, there would be no need to concern ourselves with the bowel. However, most of us are not living right.

Disease preys on a weak and malnourished mind.

I am sure it will grow back.’ The doctor said, ‘You’re too young to know.’ …But in a year’s time that fluid came back, and that eye is just as good as the other one today.

Somehow bowel wisdom got lost and it became something that no one wanted to talk about anymore.

In London the average person is paying 50 per cent of their income on rent. Just think how much better off people would feel if that number was a lot lower.

I think what I realized is that I can’t believe I made it to 50 years old.

If you just do 50 to 60 shows a year, it’s not that much time away from home.

Villains are a ball. People have been laughing at me for 50 years, so I love to sit in the back of the theater and listen to them hate me.

I probably write a poem every 50 years.

Fifty percent of the doctors in this country graduated in the bottom half of their classes.

Every Friday I used to have about fifty, sixty kids who would wait for me on Sunset Boulevard and I’d take them all to dinner. All runaways.

I have had 50 drinks in one go!