“I don’t care how much you may think they’re funny or how interesting they may sound. If we nominate someone that 40 to 50 percent of our party doesn’t – can’t stand, we are going to lose.”

Hope and Change has become Divide and Conquer.

My Dad used to tell us: ‘En este pais, ustedes van a poder lograr todas las cosas que nosotros no pudimos’ ‘In this country, you will be able to accomplish all the things we never could.’

Any time you can degrade or take away the top leadership of an organization, it’s a positive step forward.

The most important institution in society is the family. If the family breaks down, society breaks down.

Donald Trump is not a Republican. Donald Trump is not a conservative. Donald Trump is trying to pull off the biggest scam in American political history, basically a con job, where he’s trying to take over the Republican Party by telling people he’s someone who he is not.

We’re special because dreams that are impossible anywhere else, come true here. That’s not just my story. That’s your story. That’s our story.

I’ll support Donald [Trump] if he’s the Republican nominee.

Let me just say the rules are what they are in the Republican Party. You have to have X-number of delegates in order to be the nominee. And if you don’t have those number of delegates, then there’s a process in place.Here is what would be a calamity, for Donald Trump to become our nominee.

The vast majority of the American people are hard-working taxpayers who take responsibility for their families, go to work every day, they pay their mortgage on time, they volunteer in the community.

I’m not going to change who I am. I’m not going to change why I’m running… I’m running for president [in 2016], and I’m running because we can’t afford another four years like the last eight years.

When I’m president of the United States, we’re going to have a VA that cares more about our veterans than about the bureaucrats who work at the VA.

I am but a generation removed from poverty and despair. Where would I be today if there had never been an America?

The truth is every problem can’t be solved by government. Many are caused by the moral breakdown in our society. And the answers to those challenges lie primarily in our families and our faiths, not our politicians.

You know, now that I come to think of it, the blizzard may be the best thing to happen to the American economy in 12 months.

Conservatism has always been about reforming government and solving problems, and that’s why the conservative movement should lead on immigration reform.

If you elect me president, we will have a president that believes America is the greatest country in the world and we will have a president that acts like it.

If you just do 50 to 60 shows a year, it’s not that much time away from home.

Villains are a ball. People have been laughing at me for 50 years, so I love to sit in the back of the theater and listen to them hate me.

I probably write a poem every 50 years.

Fifty percent of the doctors in this country graduated in the bottom half of their classes.

Every Friday I used to have about fifty, sixty kids who would wait for me on Sunset Boulevard and I’d take them all to dinner. All runaways.

I have had 50 drinks in one go!

There were fifty-four women and forty little boys with the Red Army prisoners, and I went daily to take care of them also.

You know, an hour and fifty-four minutes is too much for audiences. They get nervous.