Everybody is xenophobic to an extent.
P. J. O'ROURKEAlways read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.
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Thank you, Occupy Wall Street. With your vivid example of anticapitalist squalor, I’ve been able to convince all three of my children to become investment bankers.
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Catchphrases flourish in contemporary American English.
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We need a government, alas, because of the nature of humans.
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Bill Clinton is not a hypocrite. If a man believes that it is just and moral to redistribute wealth, there is nothing hypocritical in his attempts to redistribute some of that wealth to himself.
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Computers seem a little too adaptively flexible, like the strange natives, odd societies, and head cases we study in the social sciences. There’s more opposable thumb in the digital world than I care for; it’s awfully close to human.
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Political leaders are expert at saying nothing.
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In its worse forms, conservatism is a matter of ‘I hate strangers and anything that’s different.’
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To mistrust science and deny the validity of scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You’d better go look for work as a plant or wild animal.
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Wealth brings great benefits to the world. Rich people are heros.
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You can’t destroy America by destroying our elite. Think about America’s elite. Think about it down through history. Destroy our elite, and about half the time, you’re doing us a favor.
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When you’re a war correspondent, the reader is for you because the reader is saying, ‘Gee, I wouldn’t want to be doing that.’ They’re on your side.
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Global warming is a fact. Now it’s up to liberals to make it a reality. Hence there is crucial importance in preventing powerful, greedy free market forces from getting in the way of worsening storms and rising sea levels. The Kyoto Accord is a good first step.
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I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a ‘learning experience.’ Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I’ve done as a ‘learning experience.’ It makes me feel less stupid.
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A humorist doesn’t really do that much note-taking.
P. J. O'ROURKE






