Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we’re looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn’t test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.
P. J. O'ROURKEPolitical leaders are expert at saying nothing.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.
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There isn’t much room for an outsider point of view in print any more.
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I look around my house, and everything except the kids and dogs was made in China. And I’m not sure about the kids. They have brown eyes and small noses.
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Fiscal conservatism is just an easy way to express something that is a bit more difficult, which is that the size and scope of government, and really the size and scope of politics in our lives, has grown uncomfortable, unwieldy, intrusive and inefficient.
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Family love is messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.
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Politics is the attempt to achieve power and prestige without merit.
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There is a simple rule here, a rule of legislation, a rule of business, a rule of life: beyond a certain point, complexity is fraud. You can apply that rule to left-wing social programs, but you can also apply that rule to credit derivatives, hedge funds, all the rest of it.
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Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective.
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Just because a subject is serious doesn’t mean it doesn’t have plenty of absurdities.
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Why do elites hate the poor? It’s xenophobia. They don’t know any poor people – except their off-the-books Brazilian nanny and illegal immigrant cleaning lady from Upper Revolta who don’t speak English.
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If government were a product, selling it would be illegal.
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Call a man ‘ignorant,’ and you have license to show the world your vast fund of knowledge and wise him up.
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The whole idea of our government is this: If enough people get together and act in concert, they can take something and not pay for it.
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Supposedly, summer vacation happens because that’s when the kids are home from school, although having the kids home from school is no vacation. And supposedly the kids are home from school because of some vestigial throwback to our agricultural past.
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Israel is slightly smaller than New Jersey. Moses in effect led the tribes of Israel out of the District of Columbia, parted Chesapeake Bay near Annapolis, and wandered for forty years in Delaware.
P. J. O'ROURKE