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The world is being run by irresponsible spoiled brats.

P. J. O'Rourke

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If you spend 72 hours in a place you’ve never been, talking to people whose language you don’t speak about social, political, and economic complexities you don’t understand, and you come back as the world’s biggest know-it-all, you’re a reporter. Either that or you’re President Obama.

P. J. O'ROURKE

If you spend 72 hours in a place you’ve never been, talking to people whose language you don’t speak about social, political, and economic complexities you don’t understand, and you come back as the world’s biggest know-it-all, you’re a reporter. Either that or you’re President Obama.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Economic Hour Language Political Seventy Two
Think what evil creeps liberals would be if their plans to enfeeble the individual, exhaust the economy, impede the rule of law, and cripple national defense were guided by a coherent ideology instead of smug ignorance.

P. J. O'ROURKE

Think what evil creeps liberals would be if their plans to enfeeble the individual, exhaust the economy, impede the rule of law, and cripple national defense were guided by a coherent ideology instead of smug ignorance.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Creep Economy Enfeeble Image
Liberals have invented whole college majors – psychology, sociology and women’s studies – to prove that nothing is anybody’s fault.

P. J. O'ROURKE

Liberals have invented whole college majors – psychology, sociology and women’s studies – to prove that nothing is anybody’s fault.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Fault Invent Liberal Major Sociology
There is no virtue in compulsory government charity, and there is no virtue in advocating it. A politician who portrays himself as ‘caring’ and ‘sensitive’ because he wants to expand the government’s charitable programs is merely saying that he’s willing to try to do good with other people’s money.

P. J. O'ROURKE

There is no virtue in compulsory government charity, and there is no virtue in advocating it. A politician who portrays himself as ‘caring’ and ‘sensitive’ because he wants to expand the government’s charitable programs is merely saying that he’s willing to try to do good with other people’s money.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Advocate Compulsory Merely Politician
Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.

P. J. O'ROURKE

Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.
P. J. O'ROURKE
The whole idea of our government is this: If enough people get together and act in concert, they can take something and not pay for it.

P. J. O'ROURKE

The whole idea of our government is this: If enough people get together and act in concert, they can take something and not pay for it.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Idea Whole
Why do elites hate the poor? It’s xenophobia. They don’t know any poor people – except their off-the-books Brazilian nanny and illegal immigrant cleaning lady from Upper Revolta who don’t speak English.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Elite English Xenophobia
Globalization is simply opening the free marketplace to encompass the entire world.

P. J. O'ROURKE

Globalization is simply opening the free marketplace to encompass the entire world.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Economic Globalization Marketplace Simply
Sometimes the right response to evil is an appeal to powerful and effective social organization – an appeal to civilization itself.

P. J. O'ROURKE

Sometimes the right response to evil is an appeal to powerful and effective social organization – an appeal to civilization itself.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Itself Sometimes
All change is bad. But sometimes it has to be done.

P. J. O'ROURKE

All change is bad. But sometimes it has to be done.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Sometimes
Just because a subject is serious doesn’t mean it doesn’t have plenty of absurdities.

P. J. O'ROURKE

Just because a subject is serious doesn’t mean it doesn’t have plenty of absurdities.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Just Mean Plenty Subject
To mistrust science and deny the validity of scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You’d better go look for work as a plant or wild animal.

P. J. O'ROURKE

To mistrust science and deny the validity of scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You’d better go look for work as a plant or wild animal.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Method Mistrust Resign Validity
Don’t send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals, when their cheery effect is needed.

P. J. O'ROURKE

Don’t send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals, when their cheery effect is needed.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Card Christmas Funeral Greeting Send
Each child is biologically required to have a mother. Fatherhood is a well-regarded theory, but motherhood is a fact.

P. J. O'ROURKE

Each child is biologically required to have a mother. Fatherhood is a well-regarded theory, but motherhood is a fact.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Biological Child Each Fatherhood Requires Well
We need a government, alas, because of the nature of humans.

P. J. O'ROURKE

We need a government, alas, because of the nature of humans.
P. J. O'ROURKE
When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.

P. J. O'ROURKE

When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.
P. J. O'ROURKE

First Legislator Sell Sold

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The world is being run by irresponsible spoiled brats.

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