Life is rather like a tin of sardines – we’re all of us looking for the key.
ALAN BENNETTWe have fish and chips, which W. and I fetch from the shop in Settle market-place.
More Alan Bennett Quotes
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I saw someone peeing in Jermym Street the other day. I thought, is this the end of civilization as we know it? Or is it simply someone peeing in Jermyn Street?
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The majority of people perform well in a crisis and when the spotlight is on them; it’s on the Sunday afternoons of this life, when nobody is looking, that the spirit falters.
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Deluded liberal that I am, I persist in thinking that those with a streak of sexual unorthodoxy ought to be more tolerant of their fellows than those who lead an entirely godly, righteous and sober life.
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Far from wanting time to pass, one just wishes one had more of it. If one wanted to pass the time one could go to New Zealand.
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You have the knowledge but that does not entitle you to be superior. Knowledge makes you the servant not the master.
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Memories are not shackles, Franklin, they are garlands.
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Knowing as their own dusk falls that they will only be remembered for remembering someone else.
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Our father the novelist; my husband the poet. He belongs to the ages – just don’t catch him at breakfast.
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It [Cambridge] wasn’t a holy grail in the sense that I’d never been to Cambridge.
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Some local boys come in and there is a bit of chat between them and the fish-fryer about whether the kestrel under the counter is for sale.
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[B]riefing is not reading. In fact it is the antithesis of reading. Briefing is terse, factual and to the point.
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But most men regard their life as a poem that women threaten.
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To play Trivial Pursuit with a life like mine could be said to be a form of homeopathy.
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My experience came before most of you were born.
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Polly: Education with socialists, it’s like sex, all right as long as you don’t have to pay for it.
ALAN BENNETT






