Having lost the last war, they are currently enjoying a “Wirtschaftswunder,” which can be briefly translated as “The best way to own a Mercedes is to build one.”
ALAN CORENWhy they emigrated is not exactly clear, but many scholars believe it was because they saw the way Sweden was going, i.e. neutral.
More Alan Coren Quotes
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Why they emigrated is not exactly clear, but many scholars believe it was because they saw the way Sweden was going, i.e. neutral.
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Disneyworld… is a historical reconstruction as sanitised as the Kremlin’s, and a future vision as uncognisant of contemporary pointers as Peter Pan’s.
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Enjoy your life today because yesterday had gone and tomorrow may never come.
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But even today, ninety per cent of the items covered by the word are forgettable objects in which cigarettes can be left to go stale.
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Jacob is a German Shepherd. (I have never understood why they aren’t called German Sheepdogs. What do the Germans call shepherds?)
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Malta is the only country in the world where the local delicacy is the bread.
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The Act of God designation on all insurance policies; which means, roughly, that you cannot be insured for the accidents that are most likely to happen to you.
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English Bohemianism is a curiously unluscious fruit.
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All I know of birds to this date is that sparrows are the ones that are not pigeons.
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Since both its national products, snow and chocolate, melt, the cuckoo clock was invented solely in order to give tourists something solid to remember it by.
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Democracy consists of choosing your dictators, after they’ve told you what you think it is you want to hear.
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It is a magic carpet under which everything has been swept.
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I sometimes wonder if the manufacturers of foolproof items keep a fool or two on their payroll to test things.
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The role of humour is to make people fall down and writhe on the Axminster, and that is the top and bottom of it.
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There are many mysteries in old age but the greatest, surely, is this: in those adverts for walk-in bathtubs, why doesn’t all the water gush out when you get in?
ALAN COREN